Monday, January 31, 2022
A fantastic night's sleep! I slept till 4:30. OMG! I haven't done that in years. I'm not a bad sleeper, as many of my aged friends are. No, Mike and I both slept like babies. I had insomnia when I was 15, right after my father died. It was a year and a half of hell. It ended with my first night sleeping in a dorm my freshman year. I assume it was the terror of my mom that kept me up all night. I pity anyone with insomnia.
Judy called early. She had to be up to drive one of Mei's Turo cars to the airport. We talked until my alarm went off, warning me I had to leave for my PT appointment. I quickly washed my face and wet down my hair. On the way out the door, I had to make sure to say, "Stay!" to Elsa. When she sees me pick up my purse, she's ready to go. This dog loves to ride in the car, even if it means going to the vet.
Mike and I had a travel carrier for her when we picked her up at the breeder's in Honolulu. Man, she howled her head off. I asked the breeder what I could do to comfort her. The breeder said, "She loves riding in the car." Yeah, if she let loose. That's what I do now. Elsa rides in my lap. We needed the carrier for the flight back to the Big Island.
I made it to the PT in plenty of time. As usual, I had to wait and got some reading done. The main problem was still with my feet, both of them. Katie checked carefully to figure out where the pain was and where it might be coming from. She felt it wasn't sciatica. But it might be another entrapped nerve running parallel to the sciatic nerve. We still worked on my feet. She noticed pronation, particularly of my left foot. She decided to put arch supports into my shoes. She put something in, watched me walk, and made some modifications. She said it was going to be an arts and crafts day. Several chiropractors have recommended arch supports. I had that done twice. Never again. They didn't feel right and were expensive. I had one pair that made me walk on the outer edge of my feet. I refused to accept them or pay for them. I was grateful for the arch support Katy was building for me. It felt right. It comforted. It cost $18. I told her, "I could kiss you." I think she took me literally instead of figuratively.
I was exhausted after leaving PT. There must be something relaxing about these arch supports. I wanted to go to Costco but realized I didn't have time if I was going to t make it home for my 11 am Reading office hours. I had one person scheduled. I signed in but was never allowed into the meeting. I called Julia to remind her to let me in. She texted back that she was on another call and would deal with it in five minutes. By the time she got back to me, it must have been 11:15. Most people sign in for the reading office hours do so at 11. I couldn't imagine the guy, it was a guy, would hang around that long. Julia finally let me in and apologized. Someone had messed with her computer. Apparently, this meeting is set up to start automatically. Julia doesn't have to do anything. She emailed Bruce to tell him what happened, and I was available at another time. She also sent me a new password. Bruce emailed me to say he would be available on Wednesday at 3. Three his time is 1 pm mine. I may have to push Mama K's crew back half an hour.
I did some work on the blog and napped. At three, I left for my appointment with my PCP at Kaiser. I had a list prepared and raced through it while she set up the computer. I know her time is limited. The small items were my need to have an appointment with the podiatrist and the ophthalmologist. She said I could contact them directly since I had already seen them both once.
The big item was my left ankle. Was this coming from the foot? The ankle? The lower leg? The tight thigh muscles? The arthritic hip? The tight glute muscles? Or my back? I hate to have a major operation on my hip only to find out it's not the root cause. I want to make a surgical appointment in case. I asked the doctor to see if she could find a Kaiser surgeon that used the direct anterior approach instead of the posterior lateral. Katy, one of my PTs, said that I would have difficulty with the posterior because my hips were badly turned in. The surgical appointment would be a good three or four months down the road. I could cancel if everything is resolved. My ankle was already better.
Dr. Reed lowered my blood pressure medication. Today's reading was 113/64. She said, "We don't want you to have low blood pressure." She also asked me about my diet. It's good except for my intake of Hersey's milk chocolate kisses with whole almonds. I don't eat a lot of starchy food other than that. I go through a 10 oz bag in about a day and a half. I was figuring that meant I ate 5 oz. of chocolate a day. Today I realized that at least half that weight was for the almonds. I consume more like 2 oz a day. That's not half bad.
Dr. Reed was a bright spot in my day as I was in hers. We laughed together. I don't laugh a lot these days. Mike and I used to laugh a lot together. We were so silly.
The doctor ordered an X-ray of my foot to check for a stress fracture. I had an emergency visit with a doctor earlier in the month. He ordered one of my ankle but not my foot. My foot started bothering me later. The ankle no longer hurt. It was just stiff. The metatarsals of the two small toes were bothering me now. There's also some numbness on the outside of the foot. I got that X-Ray before I left Kaiser. The X-ray tech had me twist to get my foot into the correct position. She commented on my flexible back. Really! I don't see myself as flexible anywhere.
I called the mother of the M & W sisters on the way home. I wanted to report my experience with M. She initiated and helped me develop an activity that suited her. This was new. She was engaged the whole session when we did it.
My appointment with them is usually at 4 pm. I pushed it back to 5:30 because I met with the doctor. First grade M read what we had decoded yesterday. She read it all perfectly, except she was reading it with great conscious awareness of each sound in a word, obviously decoding each word. The objective is to use the cognitive unconscious for decoding. Her teacher may be pushing for this now. With this child, that would be counterproductive. She couldn't trust her cognitive unconscious mind not to flip the letters. She needs to do it consciously until she gains control over her mind. I can show her how to switch to automatic processing when she's ready. She is using her conscious mind to train her unconscious one for the time being. M moved around a lot today, where she didn't do that yesterday. She stood on the chair. She told me her feet fell asleep when she sat. I told mom about this too. I didn't know if there was any merit to her claim, but I think it should be checked. How can the feet of a seven-year-old fall asleep when she sits? That doesn't make sense.
Fifth grade W and I worked on organizing her purse story. Wow! When she dictated it yesterday, I thought it dragged. As I reread it today, it was just fine. I started the session by outlining the main points of the story. There was one paragraph for each point in the material she dictated.
Judy called again. I moaned to Judy about my sadness about the lack of response to my work on my reading method. I feel badly underappreciated, if not downright rejected. I was having a much harder time with it now than when Mike was alive. I think the five to one ratio applies to all relationships in our lives. I need five positive feedbacks to every one negative or indifferent one. I was nowhere near that ratio. It's me who notices the differences in the students' work. Sometimes the student notices, too.
Judy switched topics. She said she loves reading my updates. She finds my observations engaging. She was particularly taken with my attention to my body as I struggled to correct my spinal curvature and the various problems that have cropped up with my feet. She said I should put the updates in book form, one for each year. I could do that. I have a hard time imagining anyone being interested, but who knows.
Isaac stopped by. His foot was fine. His dad, a doctor, had ordered an antibiotic specifically for strep infections. Isaac said he got it in case. He knows not to take meds prophylactically. We laughed together tonight. We were silly. Ah, that felt so good. I have relationships developing with two men, neither possible mates. Truth be told, however much I miss what I shared with Mike, I can't imagine having another relationship like that. For that matter, where the hell is Mike when I need him most. As for the two men I am developing relationships with, Isaac is twenty-one, and Lutz, who was leaving for South America for three months, is fifty-eight. We're three generations. Although, I'm actually old enough to be Isaac's great-grandmother.
