There was a question as to whether I would go to Bikram today. My back bothered me yesterday; I didn't want to make it worse, even if it was just a bad charley horse. I was fine when I went to bed last night and perfect when I got up this morning. I did all the asanas while lying on the floor, just as I had been doing since my back problem started. I worked on strengthening the antagonistic muscle to the psoas. I finally found its name: latissimus dorsi; bet that helps everyone reading this. This muscle sits at the top of my right hip. It contracts when I lean back or try to stand straight, when my psoas is contracting, forcing me to bend over. When the pain is bad, I look like the hunchback of Notre Dame.
I did great work, but it resulted in pain. I had to get up and go to the bathroom. I crawled over to the ballet barre at the back of the room. I still need help getting up. Once I was on my feet, I was fine.
After class, I rinsed in the shower and headed to the church. There was a special service honoring people who served the church. Judy and Paulette were both honored today.
I slipped in a side door and got into a pew. I made it there just in time to see the host sanctified. I noticed that Brenda and Don were sitting right in front of me. I moved up one pew and next to Brenda. She was unaware that I was there. I sang loudly in her ear, which was a stretch for me since she was six inches taller than me. She finally realized that something was different, turned, and gave me a big smile. When I turned to my right, I saw the couple that ran the church gift shop. The husband is the father of Mrs. B., whose children I work with at school. Judy and her whole family sat in front of me. It is nice to be part of a community where I know and am known by many people. They were mostly loose connections, but there are those I see outside the church environment, like Judy, Paulette, Don, and Brenda.
This mass, honoring people who served the church, was not just for those from St. Michel's, but for every church on the island's west side. Each person was called up individually. Well, that's not entirely accurate. In some cases, people were called up as a couple, and in one case, an extended family, or an ohana, was called up together. It all took time, but I was glad I was there.
Afterward, there was lunch: sandwiches made by people from the various parishes and cookies. I had tuna fish salad and egg salad sandwiches, and two chocolate chip cookies. That was my dinner. The plan was to eat my breakfast food for dinner.
I was planning to see the massive hula celebration at the palace after church, but my back was hurting too much. The dancing was from 10 am to 2 pm. All these groups had been trained by a single teacher who was the honoree of the celebration. One of my Bikram buddies was dancing, Sharry. I wanted to go, but there was no way I could walk down there and back again without crying.
I went to the transfer station to drop off the glass I had. There was a sign saying they only accept cardboard and brown paper bags — no mention of glass. I don't know what's going on.
I went to Costco to get gas and to Home Depot to check on the floor under the carpet foam. There was this costly stuff that might do the job. For my last stop, I went to a flooring store across the street from Costco, which the chiropractor had recommended. She said they have better quality products than Home Depot or Lowe's and are somewhat more expensive.
My back was hurting as I looked at the samples. I explained to the salesman that my grim face and impatient look had nothing to do with him. His products were of better quality, but nothing spoke to me like the tight weave samples he showed me. Then I asked about under-carpeting foam, explaining that my primary concern was acoustic insulation. I told him that the product I had seen at Home Depot was thicker. He said a thick foam would void the warranty on the carpeting. Too much bounce puts stress on the carpet and wears it out. He showed me the padding he uses. It seemed thin. I asked him if I could use two layers: one of the denser material and a second of the spongier material. He said yes. Then he showed me a rubber product, saying he lays it down in condos where sound transfer is a significant issue. No one had shown me a product like this before. I talked about putting down the dense rubber product with the cheaper foam on top of it. He said that would work. He also talked about checking that the underflooring was securely nailed down so it wouldn't cause noise. I felt such relief that he mentioned this problem independently, and I wouldn't have to worry about monitoring the workmen myself. I put my head down.
I told them that Mike had just died in March, and having to deal with all these decisions was tough. If he were alive, I would be doing all the research, but then I could go home and consult with him. If nothing else, he would have told me how smart and brave I was to deal with this issue. He would also have hugged me. I started to cry, as hard as I had at Bikram on my first day back to the studio after he died. There was also a salesperson there. She asked me if I wanted a hug. I said yes. She came over and held me while I released racking sobs. I didn't know what I was crying about the first time that happened. This time, I did: I missed Mike.
I said it was a good thing the store wasn't filled with customers. Then I said, "It's Hawaii. Everyone would have circled around me to support me. " The man said they would be lining up to give me hugs. I would never leave this environment in a million years.
I went home to lie down and relieve the stress on my back. After that cry, I thought I would fall asleep immediately, but no. That didn't happen; it took a while.
I called Dorothy because I wanted to clarify why I said my right leg was weaker than my left. She just had a total hip replacement on her right hip. She was struck that my right hip was weaker than my left, not my arthritic side. I realized she was thinking of leg strength when walking upstairs; my problem on my right side is lateral.
After I napped, I walked Elsa. I talked to Mike as I walked. He told me I was a piece of work because I could comfortably engage with total strangers as I had in the carpet store. My behavior used to freak him out, but in the end, he learned to admire it.
On that subject, during lunch after the service this afternoon, a woman who just lost her husband last week and whose funeral was yesterday told us that she is going to be forced out of her home in a few months. Whoa! Their home belongs to someone else, and they want to sell the house. I offered her a place to stay if she needed more time on the island. Someone else at the table commented that I say whatever comes to mind. When I said that people would line up to offer this lady a place to stay, she responded that "no one would be that forward." I'm not sure of her thinking. If the lady said she had no place to go and might have to stay in a hotel, the opportunity to make the offer was there - well, as far as I'm concerned. I wish I understood how other people think better. It would be worthwhile learning because there is always someone for whom my way of relating is offensive. I don't think it was for the lady I made the offer to. She has expressed delight in my straightforwardness.
After I walked Elsa, I made my usual morning soup. I had it for dinner with my smoothie. Yvette came up and offered me a slice of pizza. Now I have two sandwiches, a slice of pizza, and two broiled chicken backs and legs in the fridge. My food supply runneth over. I hope I get to eat it all before it goes bad.
I did great work, but it resulted in pain. I had to get up and go to the bathroom. I crawled over to the ballet barre at the back of the room. I still need help getting up. Once I was on my feet, I was fine.
After class, I rinsed in the shower and headed to the church. There was a special service honoring people who served the church. Judy and Paulette were both honored today.
I slipped in a side door and got into a pew. I made it there just in time to see the host sanctified. I noticed that Brenda and Don were sitting right in front of me. I moved up one pew and next to Brenda. She was unaware that I was there. I sang loudly in her ear, which was a stretch for me since she was six inches taller than me. She finally realized that something was different, turned, and gave me a big smile. When I turned to my right, I saw the couple that ran the church gift shop. The husband is the father of Mrs. B., whose children I work with at school. Judy and her whole family sat in front of me. It is nice to be part of a community where I know and am known by many people. They were mostly loose connections, but there are those I see outside the church environment, like Judy, Paulette, Don, and Brenda.
This mass, honoring people who served the church, was not just for those from St. Michel's, but for every church on the island's west side. Each person was called up individually. Well, that's not entirely accurate. In some cases, people were called up as a couple, and in one case, an extended family, or an ohana, was called up together. It all took time, but I was glad I was there.
Afterward, there was lunch: sandwiches made by people from the various parishes and cookies. I had tuna fish salad and egg salad sandwiches, and two chocolate chip cookies. That was my dinner. The plan was to eat my breakfast food for dinner.
I was planning to see the massive hula celebration at the palace after church, but my back was hurting too much. The dancing was from 10 am to 2 pm. All these groups had been trained by a single teacher who was the honoree of the celebration. One of my Bikram buddies was dancing, Sharry. I wanted to go, but there was no way I could walk down there and back again without crying.
I went to the transfer station to drop off the glass I had. There was a sign saying they only accept cardboard and brown paper bags — no mention of glass. I don't know what's going on.
I went to Costco to get gas and to Home Depot to check on the floor under the carpet foam. There was this costly stuff that might do the job. For my last stop, I went to a flooring store across the street from Costco, which the chiropractor had recommended. She said they have better quality products than Home Depot or Lowe's and are somewhat more expensive.
My back was hurting as I looked at the samples. I explained to the salesman that my grim face and impatient look had nothing to do with him. His products were of better quality, but nothing spoke to me like the tight weave samples he showed me. Then I asked about under-carpeting foam, explaining that my primary concern was acoustic insulation. I told him that the product I had seen at Home Depot was thicker. He said a thick foam would void the warranty on the carpeting. Too much bounce puts stress on the carpet and wears it out. He showed me the padding he uses. It seemed thin. I asked him if I could use two layers: one of the denser material and a second of the spongier material. He said yes. Then he showed me a rubber product, saying he lays it down in condos where sound transfer is a significant issue. No one had shown me a product like this before. I talked about putting down the dense rubber product with the cheaper foam on top of it. He said that would work. He also talked about checking that the underflooring was securely nailed down so it wouldn't cause noise. I felt such relief that he mentioned this problem independently, and I wouldn't have to worry about monitoring the workmen myself. I put my head down.
I told them that Mike had just died in March, and having to deal with all these decisions was tough. If he were alive, I would be doing all the research, but then I could go home and consult with him. If nothing else, he would have told me how smart and brave I was to deal with this issue. He would also have hugged me. I started to cry, as hard as I had at Bikram on my first day back to the studio after he died. There was also a salesperson there. She asked me if I wanted a hug. I said yes. She came over and held me while I released racking sobs. I didn't know what I was crying about the first time that happened. This time, I did: I missed Mike.
I said it was a good thing the store wasn't filled with customers. Then I said, "It's Hawaii. Everyone would have circled around me to support me. " The man said they would be lining up to give me hugs. I would never leave this environment in a million years.
I went home to lie down and relieve the stress on my back. After that cry, I thought I would fall asleep immediately, but no. That didn't happen; it took a while.
I called Dorothy because I wanted to clarify why I said my right leg was weaker than my left. She just had a total hip replacement on her right hip. She was struck that my right hip was weaker than my left, not my arthritic side. I realized she was thinking of leg strength when walking upstairs; my problem on my right side is lateral.
After I napped, I walked Elsa. I talked to Mike as I walked. He told me I was a piece of work because I could comfortably engage with total strangers as I had in the carpet store. My behavior used to freak him out, but in the end, he learned to admire it.
On that subject, during lunch after the service this afternoon, a woman who just lost her husband last week and whose funeral was yesterday told us that she is going to be forced out of her home in a few months. Whoa! Their home belongs to someone else, and they want to sell the house. I offered her a place to stay if she needed more time on the island. Someone else at the table commented that I say whatever comes to mind. When I said that people would line up to offer this lady a place to stay, she responded that "no one would be that forward." I'm not sure of her thinking. If the lady said she had no place to go and might have to stay in a hotel, the opportunity to make the offer was there - well, as far as I'm concerned. I wish I understood how other people think better. It would be worthwhile learning because there is always someone for whom my way of relating is offensive. I don't think it was for the lady I made the offer to. She has expressed delight in my straightforwardness.
After I walked Elsa, I made my usual morning soup. I had it for dinner with my smoothie. Yvette came up and offered me a slice of pizza. Now I have two sandwiches, a slice of pizza, and two broiled chicken backs and legs in the fridge. My food supply runneth over. I hope I get to eat it all before it goes bad.
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