Sunday, September 26, 2021

 Sunday, September 26, 2021

 

    I had another lousy night’s sleep. I was agitated about an unresolved issue. Thinking about it helps somewhat; I come up with solutions. But most of it is a waste of time. The upside of this trait is that I hang on to something until a problem is solved; the downside is that I hang on to things that can’t be solved. I’m the opposite of passive. As with all things, the AA prayer says it all. A little of this and a little of that and the wisdom to know when to apply what. 

     While my leg gave me some discomfort while lying in bed, it was fantastic as I took on the steep hill this morning. The climb was easy, and I made it up to the third fire hydrant. Some discomfort in my lower left leg showed up as I turned into my street. I only had a stretch on almost flat ground before I got home.

     My blog stats are spiking again. I had 100 hits today, mainly from Hong Kong. Schools are back in session, and some teacher is assigning my blog. The significant spike earlier was in Egypt, and it was now in Hong Kong. My tech and I think these large numbers mean some teacher is assigning it to his class. The blog’s name is making the rounds. If my interpretation is correct, my numbers should be high every school year. No one leaves comments. I guess none of my readers are invested. 

    I lay down on my sofa, anti-gravity bed. I felt lousy, as if I had been up all night smoking and drinking, filled with toxicity. I applied my vipassana training. I tried to do it during the night when I was in bed, but I was consistently overwhelmed by my fears. I felt much better as I lay there, slipping in and out of sleep. Some of the tension drained. Ah! This feeling is a nightmare because this is how I lived in my childhood, constantly battling to find a way to deal with the real dangers, all psychological, which surrounded me.  

    Sunday is another set of NPR shows. Krista Tippet had Stephen Batchelor on today. My friend John had recommended Buddhism without Belief by Batchelor. It is my favorite book on the subject. I keep it by my bedside even though I don’t read it regularly. I ordered Batchelor’s new book, The Art of Solitude. I ordered all of his books. I need to be reminded to meditate daily. 

   While I listened to the radio show, I did routine straightening that doesn’t happen as routinely as it should. It’s nice to see the order. I could do it every day and feel better. Do I do it? Do I remind myself of anyone? It all takes all of two minutes, and things look refreshed. 

    I checked the numbers on my 5 Stories audio file. The number jumped. Did adolescent D actually listen? I texted him. Sure enough. Wow! This is incredible news from him. He decided to do something and did it. He took charge of himself. Wonderful!

     Damon called. He was walking home from playing tennis. A friend was in town and coming for dinner. We mostly talked about August, and how he was doing in school. We haven’t discussed his schoolwork yet. August is a responsible child. Everyone is sure he’s taking care of business. Damon said things weren’t going well with his roommate. They’re very different. August is social, and his roommate is very reserved – possibly on the autism spectrum.  

    August said they discovered they were in the worst dorm and in the worst room in this dorm. Their dorm has no air conditioning. Their room doesn’t face the ocean, which means no breezes, and it is right next to the entrance, which means people pass their door all night long. Then their window overlooks a parking lot, which means headlights flash on their ceiling all night long. The room across the hall became free. One student left, and the other went somewhere else on the campus. August and his roommate are angling to get that room. It would be an upgrade. Cylin, August’s mother, and I said, “Just move in. Squatter’s rights.”

     I got an email from sixth-grade D’s mother saying she wanted to drop classes until he got his eyes checked. I think this is because I told him the lines of print jumped around, making reading challenging. I should learn to keep my mouth shut. A vision problem can cause that, but you would see the eyes flickering back and forth. D’s problem is perceptual. We’ll see. I taught him the release pattern. It helped. Even if it comes back, he can fix the problem using the release. It may take many releases before the brain pattern changes permanently.