After I was in bed, Elsa set up a barking storm. I heard a male voice calling her. I assumed someone was in the driveway. Then I heard what sounded like the front screen door close. I got up to check. Elsa wasn't barking, and the house felt safe. I check the front screen door. In fact, it was unlocked. I always keep it lock. I locked it and went back to bed.
It was then I checked my phone. I had heard a ping while I was reading in bed. I just let it go. It said, "Josh is coming up to walk in the room." As Josh walked on the bedroom floor, Yvette recorded the sounds. I had walked on the floor earlier. I could feel places where my foot seemed to sink lower, and I thought I heard a sound. Yvette had already reported that the work on the ceiling hadn't remedied the acoustic problem.
Today it is one year and nine months since Mike died. I haven't been keeping count – up to now. As I say, I'm having about of grief.
After driveway yoga, Yvette and Scott came in, and we discussed how to address the ongoing problem. We decided that the problem had to do with the subflooring. It had probably delaminated. Lamination is the process of gluing things together in sheets. Delamination is when that glue gives out, and the pieces no longer adhere to each other. The only solution was to replace the subflooring.
Only half the flooring will have to be replaced, the section of floor where people walked in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. We could roll back the rug, pull up the subflooring in the exposed area, and, hopefully, relay the carpet. I thought I could also replace the damaged acoustical padding.
First, I had to find a carpet man that was willing to do the work. It is hard to find someone who will relay carpeting after it's been pulled up. I called Sandor for the name of the carpet man his father-in-law has used forever.
I have written how dealing with all life's problems with Mike was fairly easy. Nothing seemed particularly stressful. This is the most stressful thing I have ever dealt with in my adult life. No, I disintegrated similarly right before we moved to Princeton from Brooklyn.
Mind, it had been my idea. I knew it was right. I don't mean I 'knew it was right because it was the best thing for Mike's relationship with Damon and Damon. I mean, I "knew it was right. Seeing my reaction as the moved approached, Mike was willing to back out. But I knew this was as it should be and said, let's go ahead.
I was planning on eating the chicken back I cooked the other day for dinner. I operated the oven during the day when the electricity was supplied by the solar panels. I made a leg and back the other day. I ate the leg last night and was going to have the back for dinner tonight. I couldn't find it for love nor money. I had to resort to a frozen salmon patty. I have complained about them in previous updates. However, I have figured out how to prepare them, so they taste just fine. I heat the frying pan and throw it in the frozen patty without any oil. It comes out perfect.
I watched some more of Red Oaks. Ah, I'm thoroughly enjoying it. There is just enough frustration for the protagonist to keep it interesting, but not so much to cause me stress. Nor is it complete fluff. It raises some issues about life. It has a contemporary touch to it while it is set in the late '80s.
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Musings:
There was a show on the Hidden Brain called 'Creating God.' The argument is that you can see how the nature of God in religions has changed in response to population growth and the growth of civil society.
This is an argument that humans create God. For Azim Shariff, this position argues God doesn't really exist. I don't see it. There is no way we can prove that God exists or doesn't exist. I like the idea that God presents a smorgasbord of beliefs to all of humanity. If there is a god, there is only one. That God is so generous to offer all these beliefs so we can pick one that appeals to us. My God is generous. I don't see a conflict between religions. We're all the three blind men scoping out that elephant.
Humans historically spent their lives in a group of no larger than 150. I think the Gods, up to that point, helped people with nature and in battle. When population groups got larger, we needed a God that was concerned with our moral behavior.
Trust was unnecessary before groups got too large. No one could get away with anything because they were under constant observation by their fellow group members. Cheating, stealing, adultery was impossible without being caught. Everyone was watching you.
Trust became a problem with population growth, probably mixing tribal interactions in new ways. It was helpful if you knew someone was of the same religion, worshipped the same God. That God was watching both of you.
As populations grew, a punishing God became necessary, a God who knew your every thought and action, a God who would punish those who took advantage of their invisibility.
The introduction of a more compassionate God than punishing one is a response to a more robust civil system of control. He says as we trust civil institutions more, the need for God slips away.
I don't get it. Life is always difficult. I'm with Pascal. Why not believe if it makes your life easier? I don't believe in a punishing God, at least not one who punishes you for believing 'incorrectly.' I don't know if I believe in a punishing God at all. I think life takes care of that for us. We create our own hell. Can't imagine an afterlife hell can be much worse than the lives I see some people live right here and now.
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