Wednesday, April 19, 2023

 Wednesday, April 19, 2023

  I got up shortly before eight. I had roused before then and heard the wind blowing. Before I dozed off, I tried to figure out if it was raining too or just windy. If it was raining hard, I couldn't walk.

  I applied tea tree oil to Elsa's lesions shortly after I rose. Her skin looked good. Regular bathing may solve the problem. If I put my good intentions into action and bathed her once a week, her skin issues might disappear. Elsa went out the doggy door before I threw a treat. Then sat outside looking for me to throw it. A little later, she went to the bathroom's outer door and looked back, a sign she wanted me to open the door for her. I walked to the doggy door. She followed quickly and went out without further prompting. 

  I heard Scott come out of his room as I was getting dressed. He was on his way out. I asked him to wait a minute to help me treat Elsa's ears. It's a two-phase treatment. First, I have to put in an ear flush and then wait twenty minutes before putting in another liquid with a syringe. I could do the second phase on my own, but she wouldn't stay still for the first.

  We did manage to get a walk in just before it started raining. The first drops hit as I turned into the driveway. I got to work on the updates, posting last year's for this date and some work on the current ones. 

   Judy called. I asked her if she or her sister could use some of my approaches to teaching reading with Judy's grandson. It is hard for people trained in traditional teaching methods to grasp my method. I can understand that. My approach conflicts with the one they learned. It's hard when you've learned something one way to understand the relevance of another. We all have that problem. 

   Auntie P, as Paulette is known to one and all, has a degree in music. She would be comfortable with the first two steps in my process: counting the bounces (syllables) in each word and identifying the part of the word pronounced in each syllable. If that is all she is willing to do, that will start orienting the boy in his sense perception of words. The next step may not be comfortable for Auntie P or Judy. Sounding out the individual sounds within each word. That can get really confusing for someone who thinks it is standardized. All my exercises aim to ground the student in their own knowledge of their sense perception versus their memory of something someone told them.

   I had an acupuncture appointment at 11:30. Jennifer texted to say she would be over early, which was okay with me. I told her about the fall I took a week and a half ago.  Before the session started, I got a call from Kaiser. Terry called to make an appointment to have my shoulder checked. I told Terry I already had an appointment for Monday at noon to have the hip checked. She said it wasn't for my hip but for my shoulder. We went round and round. I told her I would call her back after my acupuncture appointment to straighten it out.

  The acupuncturist worked on my upper back and arms. She felt the lump in my left upper arm again and said the same thing she said last time: It was a lipoma. No, she didn't think it was a torn muscle because the circumference of the lump was well-defined. That's good news. A lipoma is trivial.  

  

The acupuncturist massaged my upper back and arms and then inserted the needles. That was interesting. Usually, there is no immediate painful response. She put in one, and I howled. While the needle was in my back, the pain was under my right collarbone. She removed the needle immediately, but the pain lingered for a while. She asked if my howling was a reflection of my degree of pain. I wondered the same thing. I concluded it reflected pain, surprise, and confusion. The location and sharpness of the pain were weird. She found it unusual that I should have pain in the front of my body when she inserted the needle into my back. There was a second incident of sharp pain. Again, she removed the needle immediately. It wasn't as bad as the first had been. 

   I took a nap after the session. When I woke up, it was two eighteen. I was supposed to meet with Adolescent D at two pm. I rushed to sign up. I couldn't get the Zoom email connection to work. I shut down my computer and called D on my phone. We continued to talk about his passivity. Again, he made it clear he would not consider doing the interview for his class assignment. He is so hidden. While he acknowledges that his disposition is a problem, he does not try to help himself. He says there is something he is so ashamed of that if others knew, including his mother and me, no one would like him.  

   D's mother said left to his own, he would only watch videos and play games on the computer. The only activity in which he takes an active part is the games. Other than that, he is a passive observer.

  Today, I said, "I have no idea how to help you," and just prayed out loud for help from God. An image came to mind. I shared it with him, telling him I had no idea if it had meaning for him. It was an image of a human behaving like an angry, growling animal. He said yes; it was familiar.

Was his anger the shameful thing he was hiding from others? No. Good, God. Whatever can it be? I can't believe it isn't something trivial. 

  I told D about my experience with my anger and hatred for others. It was the end of a ten-day Vipassana sit. We did a Metta meditation before breaking the silence. While others got up to go to the common areas and began talking again, I sat there terrified. I experienced overwhelming anger and hatred. I saw myself creeping along the walls, glaring at the other participants suspiciously. I looked crazy as a loon. I sat there and said, "God, you got me into this mess; you get me out." What I heard was, "You're just terrified. Live with it." I got up, walked out, and was fine. There was no evidence of extreme behavior. I hoped the story would assure him he was not alone in his anger toward and fear of others. Welcome to the human condition. 

  D's mom told me that his granddad lived on the island and would be a good candidate to interview for the video. He could talk about life on the island. His granddad had a kitchen garden. I got a few questions from him about the plants he had in the garden. That's it. Nothing about what his granddad did to care for the garden or problems with the plants. Very frustrating. 

  I was supposed to have Mama K's crew next. I was late because I was late for D. The crew didn't sign in. I couldn't get to Mama K to find out what was happening. Sometime later, I found a text saying they were ready to sign on. I had missed it. Unfortunately, my phone's notification system is irregular at best. While the kids were home when I sent the link, she was out paddling and could not get them on. I would love to do the stand-up board paddling. It would be great for my balance and my upper body strength.  

  My sister, Dorothy, sent me a YouTube video on how we really pronounce drum as /jrum/, street as /street/ and train as /chrain/. There's a physical explanation for these sound switches. We don't usually hear it. However, I have encountered many children who tell me a d makes a /j/ sound. Ah, now I get it.

  Scott told me the van he had just repaired came back with a slow leak in the gas tank. The van was parked out on the street. When I passed it, I could smell the gas. I could also smell it in the evening when the breezes came down the mountain, blowing the smell into the house. Scott went out and bought five five-gallon gas cans. He put a pan under the hole in his tank. He goes out there every three hours to pour the pan's gas into the cans. 

  I started watching Season 5 of Mrs. Maisel. Oh, nuts. She winds up a person corrupted by fame.