
This blog started when my husband was rushed to the hospital on January 24th, 2019, and continues up to the present time. Spoiler Alert: He died five weeks later on March 3rd of severe acute pancreatitis. My year of “Magical Thinking” started after that, following in the footsteps of Joan Didion, my adjustment to life without Michael after 45 years together.
Wednesday, May 22, 2019
Thursday, May 23, 2019
I followed the usual morning routine for Monday through Friday. One reader asked what I do with the kettle of water; do I boil the weeds in the water? No, I pour the boiling water over the weeds to kill them with no toxic side effects.
After Bikram, I had many stops before I got home, so I rinsed off and changed into street clothes. The first stop was at the chiropractor’s. We are doing much more work on my shoulders, neck, all the area about my armpits. Then off to Target. I picked up bananas and Hersey Milk Chocolate bars with whole almonds. I had to look hard to find some. Then I went off to Midas for my annual car inspection. Here, there are no emissions inspections. I was told that only happens in big cities. Someone assumes that because we’re in the middle of the Pacific, everything dissipates and disappears. Really? I was freezing in the waiting room. I stepped outside to see if my car was even in the bay. Before I got around the corner, someone came after me to tell me the car inspection was finished.
My next stop was at Costco. I picked up a package of salad mix and checked out the electric toaster ovens with convention. Holy Cow! They usually sell reliable products. Besides, it was 12 dollars off the usual price. I grabbed it.
I thought of going to school to work with one student who has skills but does not use them effectively to learn. He is an immature boy. I don’t know how bright he is, but he is definitely not thoughtful. He wants what’s easiest and most fun at the moment. He does not take long-term consequences into consideration. It’s as if they don’t exist. He has the skills to improve his learning skills on his own now but won’t use them. Yes, he’s right: good readers just look at the word, and the correct word pops out of their mouths. However, that’s not how the good reader learned to read. You can’t imitate the person who has perfected the skill if you want to learn it. That’s a pretty sophisticated idea. There are adults I’ve met that don’t get that. There are moments in my life when I don’t get it. What’s with us?
When I got home, I cleaned house in anticipation of my niece Shivani and her 2-year-old son, Sidney, arriving. It’s not that she would care if the house was clean or not; it’s my need to use a guest as motivation to clean the house. Mike and I used to say, “Where’s a guest when you really need one?” I washed the kitchen floor, did some light vacuuming of the lanai, washed the guest bathroom floor, cleaned the bathroom countertop, and cleaned the guest bathroom toilet. I used sandpaper to clean the ring. This is a fantastic discovery. It works like a charm. I learned about it from Govinda when I stayed at the ashram. I’m just using some leftover sandpaper, but Judy tells me they sell sandpaper on a stick, so you don’t have to worry about getting your hands dirty.
Yvette’s been saying that she found termites in the house, and we need another treatment. I called the company I used before. Ken, our contractor, recommended a man who worked for a termite company. He had moved to another company. The guy pointed to my bay window seat and said, “Look at all the termite wings. You have a house full of termites. You need to have the house tented; spot treatment won’t work here.” A mere $3600 for tenting. I do think we need a full treatment. Termites are a problem here on the island. They’re a problem anywhere it is warm all year round. They never have a rest, which means your house never gets a rest, and they go forth and multiply, and multiply. Here’s the problem. I’m not convinced that the guy didn’t drop those wings on the bay window. I had just dusted the day before, if not only that morning, and I find that bug stuff shows up in the corners not in the center of a large area as they did here. Whether or not I’m right, I’m not comfortable with this company. I will have to call another one even if I’m going to have the house tented.
When he left, I showered. I was expecting Shivani and Sidney around 3:30. I had just stepped out of the shower when I heard her call from the driveway. I threw a towel around me. She hadn’t texted to tell me she was in because she had left her phone in the Lyft car she took to the airport. Shivani brought in the suitcase. First things first, she blew bubbles for Sidney. He’s as obsessed with bubbles as Elsa is with balls.
Before we had dinner, we went to check out a few beaches that I thought might be suitable for Sidney. We went to Otech and Pines Trees. Otech, so-called because there is a facility down the end of the road where they tried to develop an energy source from the bottom of the ocean the same way you use geothermal energy from deep in the ground.
At Otech, Shivani, Sidney, Elsa, and I all got out of the car and walked on the beach. No swimming today. The Otech beach is sandy, but once you’re in the water, it’s mostly rock. There is a large lagoon area where the water is about knee high at its deepest. Then there’s this other area which Mike and I called the Lava Pool. I don’t know if anyone else calls it that. It’s sliced into the lava rock; the waves rush in and rush back out again. It’s not particularly deep either, even at high tide, but it is absolutely delicious. Mike and I always felt that it was like a mountain stream. We found out that freshwater did enter the pool. Someone showed me exactly where it comes in. It’s very refreshing. However, I can no longer swim there because I am so buoyant that I can’t control my body. The water rushes in; I am pushed to shore. The water rushes out; I’m pulled out to the sea. And, I’m banged against the rocks on the way in and out. Maybe if I put on weights. The buoyancy problem comes with my age and sex. All my internal female parts have shrunk, leaving me more a hot air balloon than I was when I was young.
Our next stop was the Pine Trees Beach. This is the first time I’ve been there since they built the new road. I thought the road was going to go directly to the area where the public restrooms are, but no. We still had to drive down this one-lane road along the shore, which is lined with parked cars. The beach offers camping and surfing. There is this small lagoon area where the kids splash around.
Shivani wanted to stop off to do some shopping. Matsuyama’s, our local bodega, came to mind. There is one up the hill above our house, and I was thinking of going there. As we came out of the Pine Trees road, I saw the branch of this store which his right on the main highway. Duh! Sidney, Elsa, and I sat in the car while Shivani went in to shop. Sid and I sang The Wheels of the Bus Go Round and Round. I only knew one verse, but that didn’t seem to bother Sidney- or Elsa.
Once home, I moved my car into Mike’s old spot so Shivani could park her rental car, where I usually park, which is a more convenient spot. I rinsed off everyone’s feet with the garden hose. Elsa ran into the spray, chasing it. I hung up the towels I washed earlier in the day. When I went to the bathroom, I noticed the toilet paper in my bathroom unraveled. Hmm! I wonder who did that. I’ve never had a problem with Elsa. Sidney is so much fun. I finally sat down to do some work on the blog while Shivani cooked dinner and fed Sidney. She is a calm, considerate mother.
They were tired and retired.
I went to watch some TV and cataloged books. I walked Elsa before going to bed, washed my face, brushed my teeth, and went to bed. Good night, Elsa, Goodnight, Mike.
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