Sunday, December 25, 2022

 Sunday, December 25, 2022

    It was a day of almost nothing. I had no clients today, only a few phone calls, although I got several texts wishing me Merry Christmas. I worked on updates. I was eleven days behind. I fell behind when guests were visiting. These blog entries take up a stunning amount of time- so does procrastination.   Procrastination is also exhausting, requiring a lot of long naps, which also eats up time.

   I went to the 9 am mass this morning, as I usually do. The Hulu ministry was dressed in red and did a couple of dances. When I returned to my car in the library parking lot, I saw graffiti saying, "Kill all white men." Merry Christmas. In Hawaii, the resentment toward whites comes from the Polynesian community. White imperialism took its toll here. It was still a shock to see the graffiti. Our community is somewhat insulated from the tensions on the mainland. We have all the factions represented; it's not as in your face as on the mainland. I always knew it could come here. Is this the first sign of things to come? It will be interesting to see if the sign is still up next Sunday.

   My friend Carol Zim called. She had visited me over Thanksgiving. We updated each other on our holiday plans. I told her how I was progressing on finishing off the leftovers from their visit.

   Despite her dysfunctional hearing aid, Jean called to wish me Merry Christmas. A phone call came through for her while we were on the phone. I figured it was Damon. I told her to tell him to call me afterward. I had tried to reach him earlier to no avail. I had the same problem last year. I called Damon, Cylin, and August, each on their own phone. No one answered. I emailed Damon's good friend, Eddie, asking him to check on the family. I was concerned they were all right. Damon called back almost immediately. Eddie was at their house. The family was taking a nophoncaction. But this year, it was a different story. The family had just returned from a long hike, their holiday tradition. They had no reception.

    Damon had called his mom. He told me she would call me back in a few minutes. While on the phone with Damon, a call came through for him. It was his friend Eddie, whom I had texted, telling Damon to call me. I love talking to this boy, this fifty-year-old boy.

   Scott made dinner. He had proposed it a few days ago. I had planned to be alone for Christmas. It would have been an interesting challenge. Instead, I had a delicious dinner with Yvette and Scott.

     I asked Scott to get the prepared stuffed turkey from Costco my guests and I had for Thanksgiving. It was delicious. I also asked for asparagus and local purple sweet potatoes. Scott went out this afternoon to do the shopping. He texted me the shelves were bare. The prepared turkey was gone, and he couldn't find Hawaiian sweet potatoes. He returned with a large salmon steak, regular sweet potatoes, and fresh asparagus.  

  He boiled the sweet potatoes and mashed them. When I saw the asparagus come out of the oven, I was ready to be disappointed. They looked shrunk and stringy, but they were delicious. He said he had the same reaction when he saw them. He had put them in the oven without oil or butter, just a bit of salt and pepper. They were amazing.

  Before we sat down to eat, Yvette took a plate of food to Josh. He does not enjoy social gatherings. Respect for his needs was one of his Christmas presents. I had a wonderful time with Scott and Yvette. There was laughter.

   I heard a talk on the epigenetic impact of trauma. It shows up three generations on. They subjected a rodent to a shock preceded by a smell. That rodent's offspring responded to the smell, although they had never experienced the shock. The reaction was passed on to the next generation as well. Ow! How do any of us survive? I can't imagine a family without trauma in its background.

    I have believed that trauma is passed on for a while, but I assumed it was just interpsychically. Now, I learn it can be passed on genetically as well. The interviewer asked why various offspring respond differently. The scientist explained that not everyone received the same genes from a parent. Fortunately, our genetic makeup can also be changed through healing. If not, I would be in deep despair.