Thursday, January 19, 2023

 Thursday, January 19, 2023

 

   I needed to get up early this morning for driveway yoga. Elise was back from her visit to her family in France. It was good to have her join us again.

   I emailed the co-writing I did yesterday with fourth-grade K to his teacher. She wrote back immediately, saying how impressed she was with his writing and his recall of the information on the wolf spider. The next assignment would be a topic of their choice, something they knew about.

   B asked if I could drive him to town to pick up a truck from the repair shop. Sure! I stopped off at Hope Services for the homeless before heading home. People were lined up at the gate waiting for breakfast. A woman approached me as I sat in my car and asked if she could help me. Is there any use for quilts? I know it gets cold in the winter, and the homeless appreciate something warm. I didn't know if a large object like a queen or king quilt would be useful. They can cut it in half. She said she was sure someone could use it to drop it off once the gate was open.

   I planned to get a urine test on my way home. I reminded myself before starting to stop at Kaiser. It required turning off right after the harbor road. Naturally, I drove right past the turn. I realized it quickly and made a U-turn at the next light.  

   I arrived at Kaiser as it just opened. It was a simple in and out for a urine test. The lab receptionist checked my referral, handed me a cup and a wipe, and directed me to the public bathroom. When I finished, I just dropped the sample in a tray at the receptionist's desk. None of this waiting around to be seen by a lab tech the way it used to be. They've streamlined the process.

   When I got home, the gardeners were there. Rodney had already picked up most of the green waste I had left in the driveway from pruning the shrubs. I went in, got my beloved birthday present to myself, my four-inch chain saw, and cut down a few of the larger branches at the fence side of a plant. One of the men trimmed the top of a shrub I couldn't easily reach.

   I went inside and edited the blog post for the day. I had plenty of time today to finish things, but I didn't do much. I tend to be inert if I'm not throwing myself into an activity. I want to be slow - and steady. 

    I made another attempt to get Elsa to use the doggie door. She wasn't happy as I pushed her through, but she went. Fortunately, she is small and passive enough so I can get her to 'cooperate.'

    I had a session with the J & Iz siblings. I started with first-grade Iz. Her mother received a report from the teacher. She said she had never seen such a difference in such a short time. While she was thrilled with a 20% improvement, I was disappointed. Iz was not yet on grade level. Today, I saw some of the problems. She had a problem holding on to the original sound when blending. It might be helpful if she listens to the 5 Stories audiofile.

   I worked with third-grade J on his anger. I asked him to think of a time when he was angry this week. Again, this puzzled look came over his face. He struggled to think of a time when he got angry. Then he came up with something.

    There was only one incident. In J's judo class, a bully came over and attacked him. He put his hands around J's throat. "What did you do?"  "I got his hands off me and went and sat down. The teacher came over and asked me what happened and went and talked to the bully." Holy cow! Can teaching him the basics of a meditation exercise solve this problem? I can't imagine it solved it permanently. It's not that anger will or should go away. Anger in the situation, as he described it, would be appropriate. The goal is not to have anger control us. I started this meditation process when I was forty-nine. It's been a long, slow slough to get control over the emotions that controlled me when I was younger. My plan is to check with the boy once a week. No one doesn't experience anger.  

    One side of the meditation is getting to the point where we're not overwhelmed by our feelings. The other side is also significant. To get to the point where we do not ignore, deny, or suppress our feelings excessively. Both extremes are a problem.

   I started reading Why Buddhism is True by Robert Wright. He is so funny. He writes about how the truth will make you free. Yeah, but it won't necessarily make you happy. Looking at human nature through the lens of evolutionary psychology doesn't give a flattering self-image. Buddhist meditation gives you the means to deal with it.

    He also spoke about the term 'mindfulness." In Western thought, it means 'smell the roses.' However, in the Pali texts, mindfulness means paying attention to the unattractive aspects of yourself and dealing with that calmly, with compassion. What a scream! I'm right in my interpretation of Vipassana. Or better said, Wright holds the same point of view as I do. Many people are pissed with me when I talk about always having to know your selfish reason for doing everything. Don't ever assume you don't have flesh in the game; you're never doing it solely for the other person. Believing that you do makes you a dangerous person. Boy, espousing this point of view is a great way to make enemies. There are so many who want to see themselves as pure love and pure giving.