Monday, April 3, 2023

 Monday, April 3, 2023

 

I was up early. Elsa came over to the edge of the bed. She prefers the tea tree oil for her lesions over the salve with the strong steroids. Whatever made me think an external cream she would lick off would be better for her than some pill that compromised her immune system?  

   I found another pile of poop on the lanai. I should learn by now to take her out after she's eaten if she didn't do something earlier. Wait! Last night, it was pouring. I lured her out the doggy door. She peed. I watched her, but she didn't poop. It was still pouring when I went to bed. What choice did she have?

   A friend recommended the wee-wee pads, but the open-air living means the wind blows them around. They don't stay flat; often, they wind up somewhere else altogether.

  I had to leave by 7:30 to make it to the dentist on time. I was up before the six a.m. alarm and home from my early morning walk before seven a.m. I made soup to take with me. I planned to stay in town until my ten-thirty doctor's appointment at Kaiser.

  I arrived at the dentist's in plenty of time. I sat in the waiting room. KC came out carrying Cash, her infant. Her mother stopped by to pick him up after she dropped the other kids off at school. I was scheduled for an hour, but Kris decided he wanted to wait to fill the cavities. He just worked on seeing if the teeth he made for my posts fit well. We talked.

  I commented on how great his skin looked. Winds up, he and KC are into skin care. They both get Botox treatments to prevent wrinkles from forming in the first place. I have yet to learn how they learned about this, but you must start Botox in your thirties to avoid wrinkling. Once wrinkles form, they are not that easy to eradicate. Interesting. Pretty novel for me. But of course, I don't know if there was such a thing as Botox cosmetic treatments when I was thirty. Neither KC nor Kris is particularly vain. They don't want to look old if they don't have to.

   KC and Kris live in an extended family situation. They lived as a nuclear family in the house around the corner from me for a while. The extended family bought two abutting lots. Kris and KC are building a house on one of them. Right now, everyone is living in one house. That's fifteen people. Three couples, the mother of all the wives, seven kids, and a visiting niece. Kris and KC live in one normal-sized bedroom with their three kids and a dog- and it's all going smoothly. I would love to have a situation like that. They're people who delight in working out things with each other. What a blessing!

  We talked about what made it possible for them to work out their relationships. They both said talking to each other about their needs. Kris and KC saw their parents' relationships sour because their mothers never spoke up to their fathers. Kris's mom left her dad after thirty years of marriage, leaving him heartbroken. She finally had had it – but she had never voiced any complaints. She had been a 'good' wife. Is that really what a good wife does? Both Kiss and KC saw their mothers as responsible for the failure of their marriages as their dads. I agree.

  I talked about the things that made my marriage with Mike work. Mike liked to say, "Our marriage works because there is always one adult present, and it's not always the same one." Toward the end, I asked him if he felt controlled by me. He said no. I was concerned because I was so happy in our relationship; I wanted to make sure he was okay, too.

 I had been full of energy all morning. Then, I had a sad thought, and my mood changed abruptly. I now know that the exhaustion I had been feeling was all due to sadness. The good news is I don't have some physical disease.

   While I was scheduled with the dentist for an hour. I was out of there by about eight forty-five. I went to Office Max in town to buy some legal weight paper, something more durable than multi-purpose 20 lb. It was much more expensive than I thought it was going to be. I had to buy a ream. Then I found some on sale, 36 dollars for two reams. That was a bargain, given that others were close to thirty for one. I checked before I purchased if I could buy just one of the reams. No, okay. I will always need paper.

  While I was in town, I stopped at Target across the way to check on their supply of Hershey's Milk chocolate nuggets with whole almonds- actually, I don't think they're doing 'whole' anymore. Then I went to Kaiser.  

  I was at Kaiser early. I brought my computer with me, figuring I could do some work while I waited. They have outdoor tables with umbrellas by the pharmacy—a Hawaiian waiting area. I sat in the car and made some phone calls. I called Utah Valley University to get some answers to questions. B's grandson will be going there. He gave me information that didn't sound right, so I wanted to check it.

  I called the dorm first. Yes, anyone between the ages of 18 and 27 could live there. They didn't have to be attending the University. My guess is their enrollment is low, and they need paying tenants. That checked out- great. Next, how did one become a resident of the state? His grandson had given me a state number to check. It was the tax department. That didn't sound right. I called the university admissions office. Taking a class wouldn't block the possibility of acquiring state residency; it might even enhance it. Why would a school help students get residency when they can get them to pay out-of-state tuition for courses? I don't know why, but they do.

   My appointment with Kaiser went smoothly; it was no big deal. I thought I might have a problem, but I didn't. The only problem I had was signing in at the kiosk. I couldn't remember my Kaiser number, which is scary. I can't begin to tell you how often I repeated that number when I was with Mike in the hospital. His first five digits were the same as mine. I messed up on the first three today. Oh, dear.

  I had a disturbing experience on my evening walk today. As I walked down Kukuna, a truck came up the street. I pulled over to get Elsa out of the way of temptation. The truck pulled into a driveway a hundred feet away from me. As I passed the driveway, I noticed a purple suitcase on the side of the gate against the rock wall. Concerned, I went to check. It must have been dropped off by someone from the airline, a lost suitcase. There was a document attached. I saw it had the owner's numbers on it. I called her cell; there was no answer. As I dialed the home number, the gate opened, and this man came tearing through yelling, "Are you stealing that?" Huh?

  I'm an old woman with white hair walking a thirteen-pound dog. As the gate opens, I don't move. I am relaxed, undefended. What are the chances I was trying to steal anything? I explain. "You drove in and left the suitcase. I tried calling your wife to let her know it's here." He grabbed the suitcase and took off. His energy was so intense. If I had been a person of color, no less a young man, he would have physically attacked me. He's the reason we need gun laws.

  His response was so over the top I assumed he was on a chemical or had a mental illness. This is a small community off the main drag. No one comes back here unless they have a destination.

  Hmmm! A few years ago, a young man unleashed his dog to attack a neighbor's, resulting in considerable physical damage. When Shawn reported the incident to the police, he discovered the young man had already filed a report against him for being rude. That's possible, knowing Shawn, but I don't think responding with violence is legal. The young man was the son of a police officer. Oh, dear. , I pray for an early retirement before he injures someone.

  As I continued walking, I ran into Gail on her evening walk. We chatted about the neighborhood. It is warm and friendly. Most people greet me. Once, I had five or six quick exchanges with people while on the phone with Damon. He said, "You're popular." Eh, maybe. Maybe not. Well-known for sure. I like knitting a community together. I learn everyone's name and introduce them to each other. As I talk, I learn how people have connected to others. We're all here for each other- with a few exceptions.