Saturday, October 12, 2024

 Saturday, October 12, 2024 

   I had another good night's sleep.  For another day, I didn't do stinking thinking in the early hours of the morning.  The inner shaking feeling was gone.  The key was the belly breathing.

   I've been a belly and back breather all my life.  It gave me problems with therapists who couldn't see my shoulders go up and down and assumed I had stopped breathing.  I would slow my breath but still feel the air passing in and out of my nostrils.  They left me feeling I was doing something wrong.

   Then that damn incompetent Gokhale instructor. What a nightmare!   She taught me the Gokhale rib anchor.  That concept makes perfect sense.  My core muscles are much stronger for that understanding of where the contraction should be.  I can lie on my back and raise and lower my legs, easily stopping them anywhere along the way.  I couldn't do that two years ago. However, when I first tried the rib anchor, I complained that I couldn't belly breathe while holding it. Doreen told me to do chest breathing. It nearly killed me, literally.  It indeed almost drove me to a nervous breakdown.  If I do have some heart damage, it may be the cause of that, too.

    Mike was a chest breather. I always knew it would contribute to an early death.  When he was asleep, he took one and a half to two breaths to mine when I was awake. He was also a mouth breather.  Both of those breathing traits promote anxiety.  

  Why do you never hear correct breathing on a list of good health habits along with proper diet, exercise, and sleep?  I am astounded at the difference the belly breathing makes to my well-being.  Having returned to it is such a relief.  I feel I am myself again. I find belly breathing doesn't interfere with my rib anchor any more than rolling back my shoulders interferes with my rib anchor.  I have to hold the rib anchor against my belly breath and my rolled back shoulders.  It requires coordination and strength. 

    When Elsa and I visited Paulette the other day, Judy's friend Carol was down working on a 1,000-piece jigsaw puzzle. It's something Carol and Paulette do together.  I participate when it comes to finding the edge pieces.  I take no pleasure in matching pieces with such minute differences.  Drives me nuts! 

   Carol had a hip replacement, as I did. Her other hip has been bothering her. She hadn't been doing the exercises her PT gave her. What might those exercises be? She went upstairs and got the instruction sheets.  I already did most of them regularly, but there was a variation in one I had been doing. I had been lifting my hips while lying on the floor to strengthen my glutes and stretch the muscles in the front of my thighs.  Carol's instruction sheet went further.  While in the hip lift, extend the lower half of one leg so the other foot is on the floor and only one hip and leg supports the hip lift. Wow! That was an eye-opener.  I had no trouble doing this with my right hip and leg - but my left hip and leg. Well, that was a completely different story.  I lost height in the bridge every time I switched to the left leg. Very interesting. I had no idea my left leg was that much weaker than my right.  It gives me a clear goal.

    I had the Twins this morning.  The lessons aimed to embed letters into the visual working memory. I believe the girls pretty much bypass any conscious processing.  Ideally, you use the automatic, unconscious processing but constantly monitor it with your conscious mind.  You're always looking for errors, overseeing your own work.   It's hard to do both at once. That's why you write a rough draft and then edit it. You're not expected to produce a perfect manuscript on your first attempt. That's also why a batter can lose his mojo.  Conscious monitoring dominates, and he loses his magic. Learning to control who's in control is tricky.

   I spoke to the twin's mom about what I was seeing.  It's almost as if the girls have no conscious oversight over anything they do.  Because of this lack, they appear 'stupid.'  It looks like they don't know what they're doing. I gave their mom an example using one of her favorite activities, paddling, which is a team sport. She's been doing it for a long time. I told her much of her stroke is automatic, but she also observes it for form.  I was surprised to learn she does that all the time.  It's an essential part of her paddling practice, which she does several times a week when the activity is in season. 

   The conscious processing is analytical. It's almost impossible to consider someone who doesn't do it intelligent.  It's the picture of the dumb blonde or dumb anyone else, even if there is evidence that the person is brilliant because of their excellent schoolwork.  The role of oversight opens up a huge can of worms.  When I see a student has some awareness of their performance in any area, I realize there is a core of intelligence in there.  In the case of the girls, they both feel sad because they are poor readers. I had a boy who scored 69 on two intelligence tests demonstrating awareness.  When the school made it clear to his parents that their son wasn't learning like other students and his mom said she would teach him, The boy said, "Mom, that won't work." Such an insight shows substantial intelligence.