Friday, April 30, 2021
I texted G's mother that two half-hour sessions a week would be better than just one. She said their schedule is very crowded but then gave me dates that would work for her every Monday and Wednesday. I.'s mother got back to me and apologized for yesterday's missed session. She forgot to put it on the schedule.
I had a session with Shelly today. I worked on my discomfort dealing with people who are not interested in negotiating and understanding points of view other than their own. While I am uncomfortable with their unwillingness to negotiate, they are equally uncomfortable with my efforts and insistence that we do. For both of us, each other's behavior triggers life-threatening responses- even if they're not. This harkens back to our childhoods and how our parents dealt with us. A rigid parent who responds with anger when challenged can be very frightening. I work to quiet my own life-preserving responses and find a way to tolerate their responses.
A friend had turned me on to Vit C. skincare. You make a paste from Vit C. stuff and apply it to your face. I ordered a one-pound bag of Vit. C. I mixed it with water and applied it to my face. I felt like I had rubbed my face with sand; grains were left on my face. I wrote my friend that something wasn't quite right. She just replied, sorry. I finally looked it up on the Internet again. This time it became clear that it had to be Vit. C. powder – not crystals, which I had been working with. I ordered a container of powder, but there was some delay with the delivery. While meditating, it occurred to me that I could turn my crystals into a powder. I tried grinding them up \ with a mortar and pestle. That didn't go too well. Then I tried my coffee grinder. Voila! It worked like a charm. I now have enough power to supply the whole neighborhood between my 1-pound bag of Vit. C crystals and two containers of powdered Vit C I ordered online. I don't use my coffee grinder for coffee. I don't drink coffee at all. I only use it to grind up flax seeds and green tea leaves for my smoothie. Vit. C. residue won't alter that taste.
I had a session with my adolescent E. He had a 3 pm activity. I tried to change his time to 3:30 to fit J in earlier; that was out. Then it worked out okay; J couldn't make it today anyway. While there is still a month and a half of school left, I think he felt he was done for the year. Also, there has been some improvement in his grades. He may feel enough is enough.
I asked E. how he felt after our last session when he worked on his anger toward his mom. He said he felt better. I could feel there wasn't much to work on for the day. Besides that, he was in the midst of his family of five kids and two adults. His six-year-old sisters were asking for help getting down fishing poles. The rest of the family was heading to the beach. His mom asked him to put something in the car. He loves being a help to his family. That woman did something right. She has two kids who take pride in being helpful family members. I don't think anyone can do much better.
When the car was loaded and the fishing poles delivered, E said he would start walking. He headed to town to meet up with his buddies to play video games. The noise of the family activity was a delight; the noise of the wind whistling past his speaker was annoying. It was time to get off. I considered it a good session. Sometimes just acknowledging what is good is the best.
I started reading How We Learn by Stanislas Dehaene. Wow! The neuroscientists are talking about the how of learning, whereas traditional education only talks about what is to be learned. When I was teaching at Licking heights, some teachers would make fun of me and my methods despite my success. I told them they would all be thinking the way I was in ten years. Well, maybe it would only be starting to seep into traditional education. I am still shocked by the University of Florida's definition of a phoneme. One solid course in linguistics would change the way they think about it. Instead, they listen to a podcast on the subject and consider themselves experts. Maybe I should keep my mouth shut. While I have attended many lectures on the subject, between the courses I audited at Princeton University and the colloquiums I attended, I still know almost nothing compared to someone who has been trained in the field. My exposure to these concepts has altered the way I teach dramatically. It would be interesting to hear what Dahaene said about my practical applications of neuroscientific principles to helping students improve.
I am now working on making my teaching methods available to the public. Once I have them all written up, I can go to my grave peacefully. As Judy says, it is for this reason I was born. I have helped many students, children, and adults. My methods work, but I am way ahead of the curve.
My bedtime reading has been Vogler's The Writer's Journey, a book Judy lent me. It talks about the hero's journey based on Campbell's ideas. There is always a mentor involved. Judy is the closest to someone enthusiastic about my work and prepared to support me. Others think it's interesting. Heroes need support teams. I have never had one. Quite to the contrary, the people around me have been somewhat horrified by my eccentricity. This includes Mike, who told me twice that he would fire me if he were my boss. I've mentioned this before. Delightfully, at the end of his life, he did say that he said that because I scared him. I probably scared him a lot. He loved his world organized by his own lights- and then there was me. He did say at the end that he found me endlessly entertaining; he never knew what was going to come out of my mouth next. I learned to be somewhat more constrained, and he learned to be somewhat looser. This is my idea of a good marriage. We helped each other become better people.
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