Thursday, April 15, 2021
Oh, boy. Yoga this morning went smoothly, well, relatively. The yoga was great, but someone misinterpreted what I said as demanding something rather than offering it. Afterward, it occurred to me that it may have been a difference in New York versus Maine social styles. I had the person ask about something in a conversation with someone else. I yelled out an offer. No response. I repeated the offer. No response. I heard a story once about a New Yorker interacting with some folks in California.
They were all in a bookstore browsing. One of the CA folks asked her to companion a question. The companion didn’t have an answer. The New Yorker provided the information and then went about her business, startling the CA folks. That type of jumping into the middle of a conversation just to drop some information is okay in NYC. I think the story is a hoot.
I did some housekeeping, a thorough cleaning of the white plastic tablecloth covering my fully opened dining room table, and a quick washing of the kitchen floor. It would do a world of good if I swept daily, but I don’t have that habit.
Then a dear, dear friend called to ask me for advice. I chose to use this opportunity to tell her a ‘truth’ about herself. I did it because I thought I could prevent someone else from being hurt. But as with all things, there’s purpose and timing. She hung up on me. If my timing is as off as I think it may be, all I will have accomplished is hurting her. I may lose her very precious friendship to boot, but that will be nothing to the regret I will feel if my words only served to hurt her and nothing good came out of it.
I believe harsh words spoken for the right reason can be beneficial. I had someone say terrible words to me, telling me they thought I was a bad person. I was devastated. It was someone I cared about dearly. It wasn’t that I agreed with her analysis of my personality. I got a glimpse into someone else’s mind and had to consider that others in the world saw me that way. This person must have been very uncomfortable with me to see me that way. I didn’t change radically: I’m still brash and a social risktaker, but I look out a little more for those who might be discomforted by my personality rather than amused or possibly even delighted..
I had an appointment for a dental cleaning this morning. That went well. My mouth wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I told the dental hygienist that it had finally occurred to me to brush my gums all the way back to the jaw joint. She said she wished all her clients had the same epiphany. She said she told them all to do so. My immediate reaction was that she never told me to do that. As it worked out, she thought she had. We discussed how her image of the mouth is different from her clients. We have always been told to brush our teeth, not that part of the jaw beyond our teeth. When I heard gums, I thought of the gums where the teeth were embedded, not the part that didn’t have teeth, never had teeth. Language is so tricky, communication so difficult. I didn’t see the dentist. He told me last time that he saw a cavity brewing under one of my caps. I think it’s time to let my teeth do their own thing.
I went to Costco afterward to pick up staples; vinegar, coconut water, salad, blueberries, and rubbing alcohol, which I use to clean surfaces. Yvette had texted me yesterday that she was at Costco. Did I want something? Lemons. She concluded they were out. When I looked around the produce section, I couldn’t find them either. I asked. They were way over there beyond the liquor. That makes sense.
I had a session with K shortly after I got home. He seemed calmer. I was able to speak to his mom briefly. Was she seeing a difference? No, except she didn’t hear the teacher calling his name as much during their Zoom classroom meeting. He also reported that his schoolwork went faster and was easier. Maybe the work I’m doing on focusing is making a difference. He did very well on the comprehension exercises I gave him. They were beginning 2nd grade. I started with beginning first grade. That was way too easy for him. I’m going to try beginning third grade with him, but I want to be careful not to push him out of his comfort zone.
The gardeners were already here when I returned from the dentist and Costco. They had left their ladder here in my yard last time. I figured that they had no easy place to store it. It’s fine with me if they keep it here. We have plenty of space. I came out to tell them so while they were all squatting in the front yard eating their lunch. I told the head guy, Rodney, that he should store it in this other area of the yard, where it will be out of sight, and text me when he comes to pick it up. He said something in reply that I didn’t understand. He had to repeat it several times. It was, “Come and eat.” This was both a compliment and a situation to be handled. We still have Covid floating around. I told him I would love a taste and brought my own utensil out. It was my understanding that the virus does not attach well to food. I took one piece of beef. It was delicious. He told me to get a container. I came back with a bowl and several utensils. He dished out rice and the beef stew for me. They went right into the fridge and will sit there for a couple of days. If that one piece doesn’t kill me, the rest should be good.
Adolescent D said he was tired at the end of the day, and his performance was poorer. I suggested we meet on Saturday instead of Thursday afternoon. He really didn’t know that his observation of his mental state at the end of the day was valid.
My last appointment was with A. It was more of the same. There are ways he does very well, but he still reversed both letters, b and d, and sounds, reversing the order of two sounds. However, today was the first time he initiated crossbody blending. Yay! It was time for a celebration!!
I’ve been watching a French murder mystery with subtitles. It isn’t Midsomer Murders or Vera, but it’s not totally off the wall with cruelty and violence. Over dinner, A Very Short Introduction to Theology is still my companion. I complete a few pages a day. That will get me to the end of the book eventually. I plan to reread this book, and I ordered a copy for Judy. In some ways, I think it would have been great if I had read this book while Mike was still alive. On the other hand, it could have led to bloodshed as we confronted our different thinking styles in the same arena. Oh, well, win some, lose some.
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