Tuesday, June 4, 2024

 Tuesday, June 4, 2024

      On a Ten Percent Happier podcast, Dr. Bruce Perry discussed resolving underlying issues that cause negative behaviors.  The question shouldn't be, "What's wrong with that person?" but, "What happened to them?" Duh! I took that path while still in high school in the 1950s. I remember figuring if there was a way into this mess, there had to be a way out, and I was going to find it and show everyone else how to fix it for themselves. 

  I understood that there were 'clear' emotions that prompt certain behaviors while other behaviors are driven by twisted feelings.  In not using the words clear versus twisted in any moral sense, I mean they represent two different physical sensations.  Anger and hatred can arise out of 'clear' feelings. That doesn't mean they're always right.   

   I developed my ideas around the same time L. Ron Howard developed his. There were a few differences between my theories and his. Mine resembled current theories underlying trauma therapy while his  . . . .   involve extraterrestrials. There were other differences right from the start. While his resembles naked ambition, mine were rooted in a moral basis. My intent was to promote peace on earth and goodwill toward men. My messianic bent was curbed by my father's reminder that a prophet is never recognized in his own land" and to look at what happened to Jesus Christ.  That life lesson is enough to curb anyone's enthusiasm for leadership. I developed an absolute dread of being a recognized leader. How do you disseminate ideas without taking a leadership role?  I still fear the consequences. Recognition, like everything else, has to be in moderation to be manageable. Moderation is defined by one's current circumstances. Suppose you're a resident of a small island in the Pacific with a population of 50 to 500 people. In that case, recognition should be limited to . . . . . I'll bet there is a mathematical formula that works. We can tolerate only so much, whether it's classified as good or bad.  People are speaking out about the negative consequences of fame and wealth, whereas once people thought there could be no harmful consequences from either one. 

  I planned to use my new 6" pruning chain saw but couldn't find the battery. I looked all over the house. No one would have come in and stolen a Ryobi battery and nothing else. It had to be here somewhere. What did I do with it? Ah, then I remembered. I stored it in the oven.

  My niece had a fire in her house because a battery caught fire. That's a scary thought. I hadn't had a chance to ask her for details. I only knew a battery started the fire in her kitchen.  The smoke alarm went off around midnight. She got her seven-year-old son, herself, and her cell phone out of the house. The fire department responded promptly. It wasn't a big fire. They put it out with a fire extinguisher. There isn't much fire damage, but the smoke damage was extensive. They will be out of their house until September.

   Their unfortunate experience taught me a cautionary tale: Batteries can cause fires. When I told others the story, many already knew of the potential danger. However, it only happened when the battery was charging, not when the battery was lying around. That's good information.

   Something good came out of the missing battery incident: fear energized me.  What had I done with that battery? Yerkes and Dodson did an experiment in 1908 demonstrating the relationship between performance and stress/excitation.  If stress levels are too low or too high, it negatively impacts performance. There is some variation in the optimal stress level depending on the task.  I live with too little external stress and too much internally generated stress.  A little external stress is good for me.  It helps me regulate my internal noise.

   My retired friends and I comment on how little we get done. The saying is, "If you want someone to do something for you, ask a busy person."  They'll get it done. When we have too much time on our hands, everything gets put off until tomorrow, and then the task drags on and on. There is such a thing as good stress.

  Having identified my stinking thinking as an addiction has been helpful. I can stop it now. I can say "No" to my limbic system, listen to a podcast, write, or do some gardening. What I can't do is lie in bed and fight with my mind. It will win every time.

  It was a Ulu Wini day. Despite it being summer vacation and no school, two kids came to work with me on their own. Remarkable. 

    I drove to town after tutoring at Ulu Wini to get to the cosmetics shop. I stopped at Petco first to see if I could donate a 14 lbs. bag of dog food I ordered by mistake a while ago. I tried to get someone to buy it at half price on the Next Door app. There were no takers.  The clerk at Petco said they no longer had their donation program. Perhaps an animal shelter would take it.  The other clerk had the number of a woman who would be happy to deliver it. She worked in a shop in the same strip as the cosmetics shop.  She gave me the woman's name and number. Perfect.