Thursday, April 4, 2019

Thursday, April 4, 2019

    I got up shortly before the alarm went off.  The first thing I did was call Raymond James. Did the electronic transfer go through?  Did you receive the short form you need to transfer the joint accounts to my name only?  Did you check with your legal department if the revocable trust has to be rewritten only in my name or if the survivorship clause in the joint one will suffice? I was getting sick and tired of hearing from them every time that I had to have the trust revised, so it was only in my name to tell them that I checked with my lawyer each time, and she said it wasn't necessary.  Please, send it to your legal department to clear this up.
I didn't want to repeat the same conversation over and over and over without having new information.  I was crabby about it.  I made it clear that I was not pleased with the repeat loop of the same conversation without some additional information on their part.  I also wanted to know if I needed to file for probate.  Their company may demand that I do that although my lawyer says it is not necessary in Hawaii.  There may be different rules by state or even by organization.  I wasn't very nice about it.  I wasn't soft and polite.  I was thinking they're thinking, "Gee, she is nothing like Mike. She's nasty and scary."  It's true. Mike was always controlled and interested in just solving the problem, not acting out in addition. Mike would never have acted that way, and he wouldn't approve of me acting this way either. There really is no excuse for my behavior, but there is an explanation.  I spend hours and hours on the phone trying to get information, forms, and delivering information and forms.  None of it's routine. I'm always in new and unexplored territory. It's exhausting. That's just an explanation, not an excuse.  I have to remember what Mike always said, 'It's just a problem to be solved." Keep your focus on that, and don't act out. This is not to say he never acted out.  He did, but I was mostly the beneficiary of that. And, he did do a lot less of it as he got older.  
    I had to prepare my Juice Plus smoothie this morning because I forgot to make it last night. I gulped down my two cups of water and headed out to Bikram.  After yoga, I stopped off at Home Depot to return an electric extension cord, dump batteries, and buy a plant scissor I saw Paulette use on my indoor plants.  The extension cord was not from Home Depot, and they don't accept single-use batteries, but they did have the tool I was looking for. It's a precision pruner.  It just amazes me how much there is left to learn in our complicated world. The other day I learned I could use the Rainbow vacuum to clean up poop and other stains.  Last week I learned about this tool when I watched Paulette, Judy's sister, use hers on my house plant. And, today I learned what it is called. Can my brain hold more information? Will it run out of room? 
    When I got home, I took my shower and made my soup. I don't know if I mentioned my soup before. I drink it every day before I have my smoothie. The soup is instant miso with tofu.  I boil a whole  8-cup pot water.  Two cups of the boiling water go to my soup. The rest of the boiling water goes to the garden. This is how I weed. 
    I was committed to working on the blog today, trying to catch up since I'm about a week behind. I got Thursday's out this morning.  Since I had a 1:30 appointment with my tax accountant to pick up my taxes and a 3:30 appointment with my chiropractor in the same neighborhood, I took my computer with me so I could work on the entries in between appointments. 
    Before the Bikram class started, Yvette leaned over and told me she forgot her phone. Please, tell Josh she knew and would be home at 3pm.   Yvette is the one who introduced me to Bikram. I arrived in Colorado from New Jersey for her wedding with Josh.  She picked us up from the airport and declared, "You have to try this yoga." So my first hot yoga class was right after getting off a 2-hour flight with some version of jet lag, wearing a tee-shirt and my overall dungaree cutoffs. I still loved it and have been doing it ever since.  The very thing that makes it boring for some people makes it perfect for me.  The class is always the same.  That way I can observe my own body and see the difference in what it does and how I can make changes instead of having to concentrate on the gross (in the sense of large) aspects of the practice, like, "Now, which leg do I use and where do I put it?"
     I asked Josh to come up so we could talk about how we're going to handle the repayment on the mortgage, which I just paid off.  We had had some discussion before we started this process but nothing firm. Josh and I are on the same page. Josh and I are the financial conservatives. We're both relieved to not be in debt to a bank. We're figuring out their repayment, so it covers what at least my monthly expenses: insurance, taxes, electricity, and water.  
    After I finished my two-minute appointment with my tax accountant, I headed over to the chiropractor's office.  I sat there for two hours working on the blog.  She came out around 2 pm and said, "You know your appointment is at 3:30?" Yep. I got a lot of work done. I went home after that and took a nap. After all that bodywork, I needed one.
    Sandor came over to pick up my glasses so he could change out the lenses.  He said he would have them back the next day. "There's no hurry." He had gone out of his way. 
    When I got up, I did Elsa's before dinner walk. When I came home, I ate the leftover salad and other leftovers from the funeral.  I was going to heat it up, but it was good cold, particularly the chicken dish. I entered books into CollectorZ.com while I watched TV. 
    During Elsa's before bedtime walk, I talked to Mike, "I love you. I love you. Your kiss is on my list as one of the best things in life." I know, it's a line from a Hall and Oates song, if not the title. Being able to freely express my love is one of the things I miss the most. When we got back to the house, I washed my face, brushed my teeth went to bed. Good night, Elsa. Good night, Mike.

Wednesday, April 3, 2019

Wednesday, April 3, 2019

    When I woke up, I heard Yvette talking. I wondered where she was that I could hear her so clearly.  When I got up, I found her in my kitchen.  She said she had come up to use our house phone to call USSA to get the missing information on the mortgage because her phone wasn’t working.  I usually lock the two doors facing the driveway when I get home with Elsa after our late-night walk.  Guess I missed it the night before. 
    USAA gave her the same information they had the day before. She didn’t need that address.  USAA had sold the mortgage to another company and then did something else with it after that.  That mysterious company’s name was a leftover.  
    I called Raymond James and left Yvette on the phone with them to settle the situation while I took Elsa on her morning walk.  When I got home, I squeezed some limes because I was almost out of juice. Must have my nightly limeade.  
    The financial advisor said I would be receiving a call from their ‘back office’ so I could confirm the amount I requested.  She said they would call within the hour.  I drove to Bikram with the phone sitting on my lap, ready to grab it.  Halfway there, it was beyond the one-hour mark. I called Raymond James to tell them I hadn’t gotten the call yet. She said she would call them. I checked that they had the right number.  Everything seemed to be okay.  When I got to Bikram, I still hadn’t heard from the ‘back office.’ I was planning to set my phone by the door and sit near it, so I could rush out to answer.  Instead, I called Raymond James again.  She said she would set up a conference call.  That went through, and I confirmed the amount.  The lady at the other end said she had called.  At first, I thought my phone refused the call because I was driving.  It never does that for scam calls.  Was this something new?  But, when I checked my phone, I had no record of missed calls.  There was some other cause.  When I got out of Bikram, I called Raymond James again, and she told me that the mortgage payment had gone through. Now, that’s a real relief.
    I went home immediately because I was expecting Ace at 10 to scan more books. As I was driving down my street, I saw my neighbor from across the street, Marsha, taking her morning walk. She is on team Elsa when I need help. A  truck pulled up behind me, and I had to move on. The truck followed me into my driveway.  It was Ace. He got to work scanning books. I showered, started a laundry, took out the garbage and composting. 
    I Joined Ace in the library.  John and Ace are working with their phones, taking pictures of the bar codes of those books that had one. It is only the most recent books that have bar codes on the back cover. There are older books that only have ISBN numbers.  And then there are even older books that only have Dewey decimal numbers, and then even older ones that don’t even have that. While they were doing all the books that had bar codes on them, I worked with those books that were published before the bar codes came in. I have to type in the name of the book or the ISBN #, assuming that it has one.  Mike has books from the 1940s.  These are books he got from his first wife’s collection, which came from his father-in-law. 
     Ace got me into the program on my computer rather than my phone.  Thank God because while he could just run his phone over the bar codes, I had to type in numbers or the titles and authors.  You know, despite Mike being a Luddite, I think he would have loved this program.  It would have brought order to his world.   
    I was having one hell of a time with the program. I’d entered a book, but it wouldn’t show up on my cumulative list. Had I entered it successfully or not? We had developed a system for indicating those books that could not be directly scanned and had to be entered manually; we turned them on their spines while the scanned one remained upright. 
    I could imagine Mike feeling bad that I’m doing all this work for him, that he left me with this enormous task. It was a huge task.  I would do it slowly whenever I feel like doing it.  
    After Ace left, I worked on writing. Then I went back into the library to enter a few more books.  I couldn’t get back to the program. Fortunately, Ace returned to get his glasses and showed me how to get back into the program.  He brought a friend with him I hadn’t met before.  Someone who had left Catholicism and come back with a bang.  He was signing up to be a lector and a eucharistic minister. 
    I was already exhausted and in bad need of a nap but couldn’t because I was expecting a student.  I did a little prep for my tutoring session and sat down and worked on the blog.  Good occasion to get some back work done.  I called the student’s aunt to check if she was coming. On a previous occasion, she didn’t arrive and didn’t let me know.  I thought she had just decided not to come anymore.  Now, she agreed to pay me.  I charge what a massage therapist would charge: $60 an hour.   I think that going rate here for tutoring is $25 to $30 an hour; it’s a disgrace.  Now, if someone can’t afford this, I will take a lot less. In fact, for one family, I work with the kids for free, buy the school supplies for three children, and will addon the two youngest children when they hit school age. Money isn’t the issue. Respect for my background and skills is. 
    Then I thought of another reason she didn’t come. The girl’s grandmother is getting her degree in psychology.  Since she never heard of the techniques I was using, and I told her I had developed them myself, she may have told her daughter that I was a quack.  In fact, there was a married couple who taught in the same school in Ohio that referred to me as a quack.  Now I knew these two people liked me, if not actually loved me, and thought highly of my work – or at least the effects of my work.  I  told the wife that I preferred not to be called a quack. She asked me what I wanted to be called. I said, “Call me a mad scientist.”  That seemed to suit her.  Some people are uncomfortable with ideas that are generated outside the most formal setting.  Actually, Mike used to be one of those people.  Many years ago, he told me that if he was my boss, he would have fired me.  He even knew my work was effective. Go figure. It takes all sorts.  All my worry was for naught.  She just hadn’t let me know she was too busy to make it.  
    She told me she would be here around 3pm because her niece was getting out of school early today, as is the case every Wednesday. I forgot she was in middle school and assumed she was in the elementary, which gets out an hour earlier.  I also kept forgetting that her school isn’t the one down the street where I volunteer but a good 20 minutes away.  I think I’m nervous because she didn’t let me know that she was canceling that one time. 
    While I was waiting, I finally cleaned the poop off the rug. I used the Rainbow vacuum cleaner as Yvette had innocently recommended. There was much more poop than I thought would be there.  I poured water on the half-dried poop remaining on the rug and used my handy upholstery attachment to suck up the water. It worked like a charm.  The strip of the rug I cleaned in this way stands out. Its colors are brighter than those around them. I could clean the whole carpet this way.  Being able to suck up the water means I don’t have to worry about mold setting in when the rug remains damp for a prolonged period.  It also means I can keep pouring water on until I get all the dirt up.
    Finally, the student and her aunt arrived.  I had illustrated the concept of before and after in time by using the physical model. If you are standing on a line, there is a student before you and a student after you.  In the middle of the night, I realized that this model for spatial sequencing didn’t work for temporal sequencing. One reason I love teaching elementary school is that I make these incredible discoveries about how concepts work. Now, look at this.  I think it is mind-blowing and shows why it is difficult it is to understand.
       
                  
                            Space                                               Time                                        
Beginning of line                                 A                                              Last event
                                                              B                                              
End of line                                           C                                               First event


    Notice that both the spatial and temporal examples are pointing in the same direction.  In the spatial example, the arrow is pointing in the direction the line is facing and may move.   In the temporal example, the arrow is pointing toward the future, indicating the march of time.  However, in the spatial example, A is before B, and C is after B. Where in the temporal example, A is after B, and C is before B.  The two patterns are reversed.  This is an incredibly complex concept.  Yet, we expect young children to get it as if it’s evident because it is evident to us. 
    Now, some kids learn it at home, “You’d better clean your room before I kill you.” Hmmm! Maybe not.  This means once you’ve cleaned your room, I’m going to kill you.  It doesn’t sound like a good motivational technique to me.  If that’s the only context a child hears a temporal before/after statement, you can appreciate why they are confused.  On the other hand, if a parent says, “Before you can have dessert, you have to finish your peas,” or “You can only have dessert after you have finished your peas,” they might have learned the concept correctly because in these cases dessert will follow the eating of the peas as day follows the night. 
    The student reported improvement in understanding what her teacher said because of the comprehension work we did.  In previous sessions, she had commented at least twice that she had trouble learning from her reading and math teacher because she couldn’t understand them.  Now, she said she understood her perfectly.  
    I have been in teacher workshops where this approach (see below) is overtly criticized as useless. Hmmm!  Maybe not.  On the other hand, I learned the technique in a workshop about 20  years ago.( https://printableworksheets.in/worksheet/question-answer-response.) At least, I learned the categories used.  As I remember, the emphasis was exclusively on content and not on syntax. My approach does a lot of work with syntax and includes content in a different way.  This does not mean that this process should be a replacement for other methods.  
    The process I use is a variation on the original program. Mine puts as much emphasis on the information which is carried by the syntax, the grammar, of the sentences as the informational content.  I have observed that many students don’t have a clue about how to use the structure of a sentence to help them infer the information contained. Content is also covered but differently than it is conventionally. In this procedure, every sentence is analyzed individually. The syntax in a sentence is important because it illuminates the relationship between the content words, the nouns, verbs, adjectives, and adverbs.  Without an understanding of syntax, a reader is entirely dependent on familiar content for understanding.  How are they going to figure out what is being communicated if the context is unfamiliar? Watch how complicated this is. The following sentence is a high 4th grade or low 5th grade level from  Specific Skill Series, Detecting the Sequence E, Barnell Loft. LTD., 1973.
The rodeo seemed doomed.  (In the original QAR, the questions apply to the whole text.  In this work, questions are formulated about each sentences, one at a time.)
RIGHT THERE:(Uses only the exact words in the text. This is my variation.)
1.     What seemed doomed?
2.     What did the rodeo seem to be? (I find that I have to do some tricky footwork when it comes to States of Being verbs.)
THINK AND SEARCH (“While the answer is found in the text, the student is required to combine separate sections or pieces of the text to answer the question”)
THE AUTHOR AND YOU: (This involves using background information or asking the reader to recognize that they don’t have the necessary background information so they can find out what they need to understand the text  I don’t know is a good answer.)
1.     What is a rodeo?
2.     What does doomed mean?
ON YOUR OWN: (“Requires student to think about what is already known from their reading and experience (prior knowledge) to formulate an answer.”)
1.     Why does the rodeo seem doomed? What are the possibilities? (Predicting: Reader can come up with possible answers or just hold a space created by the question.)

The rodeo seemed doomed. Heavy rains had made the ground too slippery.
RIGHT THERE:(Uses only the exact words in the text. This is my variation.)
1.     What had made the ground too slippery?  
2.     What had the heavy rains made?
3.     What had the heavy rains made too slippery?    
4.     What kind of rains had made the ground too slippery?
5.     Had the heavy rains made the ground too slippery?
6.     Had the heavy rains made the ground too hard?
7.     Had the heavy rains made the group too slippery or too hard?( The ‘or’ question structure is included because I have seen many students who don’t know how to respond to it .
THINK AND SEARCH (“While the answer is found in the text, the student is required to combine separate sections or pieces of the text to answer the question”)
1.      What was the ground going to be used for? (In the case, the only answer is the rodeo. That can be determine from the syntax even if the reader doesn’t know what a rodeo is.)
2.     What might happen to the rodeo because of the heavy rains? (Use a word from sentence #1). It would become slippery
3.     What was the ground too slippery for?  (This is the same question but using different words. Students have to learn that there are many ways to express the same idea.)
THE AUTHOR AND YOU: (This involves using background information or asking the reader to recognize that they don’t have the necessary background information so they can find out what they need to understand the text  “I don’t know” is a good answer.)
1.     What does slippery mean?
2.     What is the opposite of slippery?
3.     Who or what would slip on the slippery ground?
ON YOUR OWN: (“Requires student to think about what is already known from their reading and experience (prior knowledge) to formulate an answer.”) 
                  Sometimes a question doesn’t come to mind.  It may for you. Include it.        

The rodeo seemed doomed. Heavy rains had made the ground too slippery. Cowboys refused to take part.
RIGHT THERE:(Uses only the exact words in the text. This is my variation.)
1.     Who refused to take part?
2.     What did cowboys do?
3.     What did cowboys refuse to do?
4.     Did cowboys refuse to take part?
5.     Did cowboys want to take part?
6.     Did cowboys want to take part or refuse to take part?
THINK AND SEARCH (“While the answer is found in the text, the student is required to combine separate sections or pieces of the text to answer the question”)
1.      What did the cowboys refuse to take part in? (Students have to use information from a preceding sentence.)
THE AUTHOR AND YOU: (This involves using background information or asking the reader to recognize that they don’t have the necessary background information so they can find out what they need to understand the text  I don’t know is a good answer.)
1.     What are cowboys?
2.     What does refuse mean?
ON YOUR OWN: (“Requires student to think about what is already known from their reading and experience (prior knowledge) to formulate an answer.”)
1.     Why do you think the cowboys refused to take part? 
(Students may say because the ground was slippery.  I would push for a cause and effect answer: they were scared, they were scared their horses or they might be hurt.  I would run a whole mental image of what could happen if the horses slipped on that ground. OW!)
THE ORIGINAL TEXT INCLUDES FOUR MORE SENTENCES.


The rodeo seemed doomed.  (In the original QAR, the questions apply to the whole text.  In this work, questions are formulated about each sentence, one at a time.)
RIGHT THERE:(Uses only the exact words in the text. This is my variation.)
1.    What seemed doomed?
2.    What did the rodeo seem to be? (I find that I have to do some tricky footwork when it comes to States of Being verbs.)
THINK AND SEARCH (“While the answer is found in the text, the student is required to combine separate sections or pieces of the text to answer the question”)
THE AUTHOR AND YOU: (This involves using background information or asking the reader to recognize that they don’t have the necessary background information so they can find out what they need to understand the text  I don’t know is a good answer.)
1.    What is a rodeo?
2.    What does doomed mean?
ON YOUR OWN: (“This requires students to think about what is already known from their reading and experience (prior knowledge) to formulate an answer.”)
1.    Why does the rodeo seem doomed? What are the possibilities? (Predicting: Reader can come up with possible answers or just hold a space created by the question.)

The rodeo seemed doomed. Heavy rains had made the ground too slippery.
RIGHT THERE:(Uses only the exact words in the text. This is my variation.)
1.    What had made the ground too slippery?  
2.    What had the heavy rains made?
3.    What had the heavy rains made too slippery?     
4.    What kind of rains had made the ground too slippery?
5.    Had the heavy rains made the ground too slippery?
6.    Had the heavy rains made the ground too hard?
7.    Had the heavy rains made the group too slippery or too hard?( The ‘or’ question structure is included because I have seen many students who don’t know how to respond to it .)
THINK AND SEARCH (“While the answer is found in the text, the student is required to combine separate sections or pieces of the text to answer the question”)
1.    What was the ground going to be used for? (In the case, the only answer is the rodeo. That can be determined from the syntax even if the reader doesn’t know what a rodeo is.)
2.    What might happen to the rodeo because of the heavy rains? (Use a word from sentence #1). It would become slippery
3.    What was the ground too slippery for?  (This is the same question but using different words. Students have to learn that there are many ways to express the same idea.)
THE AUTHOR AND YOU: (This involves using background information or asking the reader to recognize that they don’t have the necessary background information so they can find out what they need to understand the text  “I don’t know” is a good answer.)
1.    What does slippery mean?
2.    What is the opposite of slippery?
3.    Who or what would slip on the slippery ground?
ON YOUR OWN: (“This requires students to think about what is already known from their reading and experience (prior knowledge) to formulate an answer.”) 
    Sometimes a question doesn’t come to mind.  It may for you. Include it.     

The rodeo seemed doomed. Heavy rains had made the ground too slippery. Cowboys refused to take part. 
RIGHT THERE:(Uses only the exact words in the text. This is my variation.)
1.    Who refused to take part?
2.    What did cowboys do?
3.    What did cowboys refuse to do?
4.    Did cowboys refuse to take part?
5.    Did cowboys want to take part?
6.    Did cowboys want to take part or refuse to take part?
THINK AND SEARCH (“While the answer is found in the text, the student is required to combine separate sections or pieces of the text to answer the question”)
1.    What did the cowboys refuse to take part in? (Students have to use information from a preceding sentence.)
THE AUTHOR AND YOU: (This involves using background information or asking the reader to recognize that they don’t have the necessary background information so they can find out what they need to understand the text  I don’t know is a good answer.)
1.    What are cowboys?
2.    What does refuse mean?
ON YOUR OWN: (“This requires students to think about what is already known from their reading and experience (prior knowledge) to formulate an answer.”)
1.    Why do you think the cowboys refused to take part? 
(Students may say because the ground was slippery.  I would push for a cause and effect answer: they were scared, they were scared their horses or they might be hurt.  I would run a whole mental image of what could happen if the horses slipped on that ground. OW!)
THE ORIGINAL TEXT INCLUDES FOUR MORE SENTENCES.

    It doesn’t take much exposure to this procedure to produce a dramatic change.  With this student, who is bright but just missed a lot of school and wasn’t exposed to complex sentence structures or complex topics of conversation in her home, it only took one exposure in which we cover a single paragraph about six sentences in length.
    I can imagine some object to what I’m proposing. I would love to hear from you.  I will be writing a whole chapter on this subject when I write my book on comprehension. I am currently working on my book on word recognition skills.
    While I had been exhausted before she arrived, I was only mildly tired afterward.  Do I love teaching? I find it wildly exciting. 
    I asked Josh for butter.  He brought up a quarter-pound made in Germany from free-range grass-fed cows. But unsalted.  Also, I found my extra quarter pound of butter in the fridge.  Must return theirs to them.
    I walked Elsa, had a salad with avocado, then the last of the whole grain bread from Safeway with butter, and what was left of the scrambled eggs that Damon made on Monday.  They were dead and tasteless, but they’re a source of protein, and they weren’t spoiled.  I can just imagine how Mike must feel seeing the way I eat. He always made such delicious food, and he made an effort.  I just try to put together enough to keep me alive.  Foodies live to eat. While I was married to a foodie and enjoyed his cooking, I eat to stay alive. I’m not too fussy about what it is as long as it won’t kill me, and it isn’t junk. I can imagine Damon complaining about my eating habits, as well.  I have dedicated one of the vegetable drawers to leftovers.  I found one remaining piece of pizza from Friday night.  Pepperoni isn’t my favorite, but it sufficed. 
    I was having trouble getting into Netflix. I was about to call customer support when I  figured it out on my own. I had to press the on button on the DVD player to get to the right ---------- I watched Shtisl while I ate. Dorothy had recommended it.  I understand it is very popular. It looks okay. I don’t really like the main character.  Too wishy-washy for me.  No sense of direction in his life other than sketching.  Also, it’s in Hebrew, obviously, and I use TV time to enter books into Collectorsz.com.
    I tried to add some books to the catalog tonight but couldn’t get into the program.  The user name and password wasn’t saved on my computer.  Back to the drawing board. I watched Frankie and Grace, season 5.  I’m finding the characters of Grace and Frankie degenerating into caricatures.  The boys are somewhat better. I still enjoy the characters from the next generation.  The script builds in surprises there.

    I walked Elsa, made notes for today’s entry, washed my face, brushed my teeth, went to bed, read a little, and turned off the light. Good night, Elsa, Goodnight, Mike.

Tuesday, September 10, 2024

  Tuesday,  September 10, 2024     I woke up late this morning and skipped my yoga routine. I went for my morning walk.      After breakfast...