Saturday, January 1, 2022

 Saturday, January 1, 2022

 

    I went to bed at my usual time and woke to relative quiet. I assumed it was 2 am, and the fireworks were over. I checked my phone, 11:48. No, the good stuff was about to go off big time. I lay in bed and watched fireworks through my glass sliding doors. I fell back asleep before they were done. These homeowner displays are not that interesting. I’m spoiled. 

      I once watched a Macy’s fireworks display from an apartment on the west side of Manhattan. They went off from a barge floating in the Hudson River. Now, that was amazing. Tonight, Some of the firecrackers were so loud, they would pull me back to the surface. On the other hand, Elsa never moved from her usual position on the bed. Those firecrackers were so old hat.

     I stayed in bed until after 6 am. It was still pitch black. My ankle was a little stiff, but less than it had been. It was easy to walk it out. I called Jean, my hanai sister. She and her husband, John, answered at the same time. Jean said she was napping. I spoke to John. I enjoy talking to him, but my conversational partner is usually Jean, and John just hangs up. It’s good to have some contact with him. 

      I did some work on the blog, and the updates, then went out for another walk. This time I called my friend, Carol Z. She sent me an email this morning recommending that I write a book about my life to fill my time. I think she thought it would be a good idea because I have written a lot about the impacts of my childhood traumas. I would fit right into the confessional mode. Nay!   Should there be any question, my parents were good people who tried to do their best. However, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. A nuclear family structure creates a petri dish that allows some destructive patterns to go unchecked. However, group and tribal patterns can develop that do the same thing. I don’t think there’s a single track that works. Too bad. It would be great if there was a silver bullet. People who claim they have that bullet in their pocket are my worst nightmare, no matter what they’re advocating.  

   I asked Carol how to chart (?) the variables in Fifth grade W’s story. Carol corrected some of my terminology: conditions, variables, etc. I will continue to make mistakes. She drew the ‘frame?’ and texted it to me. 

 

R E A L         S T A T E	YES	DREAM STATE
		YES	NO
		Ate the real food              Ate the dream food```                 . . .and what happened	Ate the real food        Didn’t eat the dream food.          . . .  and what happened.
	NO	Didn’t eat the real food         Ate the dream food            . . .  and what happened.	Didn’t eat the real food          Didn’t eat the dream food             . . .  and what happened.

 

    People called and texted to wish me Happy New Year, but other than that, I was alone. I did reasonably well. Being alone doesn’t bother me; I rather enjoy it. Unreconciled relationships bother me- a lot.   Sometimes, giving up is the only solution. So sad.

    The firecrackers started up again. It wasn’t too bad. One concussion, a few aerial, and several party noisemakers. Elsa and I hunkered down.   I ate my dinner in the living room again to reduce Elsa’s exposure to the noise. I watched Don’t Look Up, recommended by John Zim. When I read the description, I knew it was one to avoid. John told me it was a spoof. I thoroughly enjoyed it. How does Cate Blanchet stay so gorgeous? I just checked her age. She’s only 52. I still had my girlish figure at that age. I was right after that it went down the drain.

     People called and texted to wish me Happy New Year, but other than that, I was alone. I did reasonably well. Being alone doesn’t bother me; I rather enjoy it. Unreconciled relationships bother me- a lot.   Sometimes, giving up is then only solution. So sad.

    The firecrackers started up again. It wasn’t too bad. One concussion, a few aerials, and several party noisemakers. Elsa and I hunkered down.   I ate my dinner in the living room again to reduce Elsa’s exposure to the noise. I watched Don’t Look Up, recommended by John Zim. When I read the description, I knew it was one to avoid. John told me it was a spoof. I thoroughly enjoyed it. How does Cate Blanchet stay so gorgeous? I just checked her age. She’s only 52. I still had my girlish figure at that age. I was right after that it went down the drain.

    People called and texted to wish me Happy New Year, but other than that I was alone. I did reasonably well. Being alone doesn’t bother me; I rather enjoy it.  Unreconciled relationships bother me- a lot.   Sometimes, giving up is the only solution. So sad.

    The firecrackers started up again.  It wasn’t too bad. One concussion, a few arial, and several party noise makers. Elsa and I hunkered down.   I ate my dinner in the living room again to reduce Elsa’s exposure to the noise. I watched Don’t Look Up, recommended by John Zim.  When I read the description, I knew it was one for me to avoid. John told me it was a spoof.  I thoroughly enjoyed it. How does Cate Blanchet stay to gorgeous? I just checked her age. She’s only 52. I still had my girlish figure at that age. I was right after that it went down the drain.