Monday, May 9, 2022

 Monday, May 9, 2022  

   I had one hell of a night. I woke up at 2:30; that was it for the night. Grief hit hard. Having the Damons here is an absolute delight; thinking of them leaving is an agony. It reminds me of how much I had with Mike. Now, I live without company.  

    Later in the morning, I worked on my updates while Damon and Cylin were at the other end of the dining room table. They were working on a jigsaw puzzle they sent me and discussing Damon’s work. My idea of heaven. I miss having people around to be here, comfortably, in a shared space, doing their own thing. 

    My leg was almost perfect on my morning walk. It was also good when I put on my pants. I had more mass on my left leg. It was getting stronger by the day. My stride was also improving. Was it the PTs’ work, or was it me pushing hard? Katie said I should get as strong as I could before the surgery. I would be flat on my back for several days, losing muscle mass every minute. It put the fear of God in me. I’ve been working extra hard. Also, my PTs have started doing MicroMoves on me. It was effective on those super-tight muscles.

      I got my public blog out after I fed Elsa. Nah, I lied. I got her food ready but forgot to give it to her until after I published the latest entry. Oh, dear. 

    I did my morning Wordle exercise. I got it on the fifth try. I had to put in all three test words to get three letters. I can’t do much with just two. Then the word was one of those you can substitute six letters in two different spaces.  

    Today was a beach day. We headed north in hopes of finding some sunshine. Damon and Cylin remembered a great hamburger joint in Kawaihae. It was closed. The shop had a calendar posted with their hours. It was open every day except this Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday. I figured the whole family took a staycation to celebrate Mother’s Day. 

     We headed back south to the Westin Hotel. Damon had a hotel hack in mind. We would say we were considering staying there to get in. We would eat at their poolside restaurant and go to the beach. Hapuna Beach is rated the best in the USA, according to Judy. I don’t get it. Yes, it’s a nice beach but the best in the whole country? We found out the daily rate for this hotel was $1,000 a night. What?! Prices have certainly gone up. Yes, it’s a high-end hotel, but. . . .

   We went down to the beach. The sun was at full power when we sat on the chaise lounges provided by the hotel. The chairs were mostly empty. I suspect we were welcome because they wanted anyone to come in who was prepared to put out some money. As I sat in the chair, my back and leg were killing me. I struggled to find a comfortable position. Damon and Cylin went for a walk while August and I napped. Soon the cloud cover returned. We stayed for about an hour.

    As we made our way to the bathroom before our return trip home, I spotted a man who had been sitting near us.   He was on the beach with two women and two young children, a two-year-old and a child less than a year old. As always, I tried to figure out the relationship between the three adults. The man talked to the blonde woman sitting on a chaise while the dark-haired woman walked around. The man was almost flirting with the blonde woman. I thought the dark-haired woman and the man were the parents of the two young children, and the bleached blonde woman was the dark-haired woman’s mother. The mother-in-law was paying for their stay there. Then the blonde woman stood up. She was the same age as the two other people. She picked up the 10-month-old, holding her and wiping her nose as only a mother could. What!!

   When I sat up, the Damons were nowhere to be seen. I spotted them several chaises away. They came toward me and announced we were leaving. Cylin explained their strange behavior on the way out. They, too, had speculated on the relationship between the three adults and children. Cylin had nailed it. The two women were sisters. I got confirmation of their relationship when I asked the man when I ran into him outside the bathrooms. He said the dark-haired woman was his ‘lover’ and the other woman her sister. 

   Cylin nailed this guy. He was a sleaze. He wasn’t entertaining his mother-in-law but coming on to the blonde woman. Given all the work he was putting into paying attention to the blonde, he wanted to bed both these women. Yuck! 

   When I assumed the blonde was his mother-in-law, I thought of Mike paying attention to my mom to please me. When he spent six weeks in Germany, he wrote letters to my mom. He said, “You know these are love letters to you.” I sure did. However, when I saw the blonde was a young woman, I didn’t make the conceptual change from attentive son-in-law to sleaze. 

       I have been suffering from a degree of cognitive mush. I was shocked by my mind’s inability to grasp things I would typically have no problems with. I cut myself a break. Yes, there’s my age. However, I was also under a lot of stress. There’s the grief, which has hit very hard this year. Susan from the bereavement center sent me a document that said temporary cognitive impairment is a side effect of grief. Then I had the Damons here just as guests without Mike or a Mike-centered activity for the first time. That was a major adjustment. Then I had to deal with Damon’s desire to cut the visit short to go to Maui for the sunshine. Lastly, I had the incredible anxiety involved in my anticipation of the operation. I cut myself a break.

    After dinner, Isaac stopped over to meet the Damons. August was exhausted and didn’t want to join. Cylin dominated until Damon joined. Then the circle opened, and I was included. Isaac was charming. August did join us. He was still sleepy and not particularly engaged.