Wednesday, May 11, 2022

 Wednesday, May 11, 2022

   It was a bad night. I was beside myself, worrying about the operation. Terry said I would need another one in 15 years. When I got up, I checked the statistics. They are more optimistic. They say 96% will last 10 years, 75% will last 15 to 20 years, and 58% will last 25 years or more. I should be a good bet. I’m not overweight, and I am active. I will keep moving and do the specific exercises.

    I got up at 5:30, walked Elsa, posted my public blog entry, downed two cups of water, and prepared a soup to go before Damon announced, “We’re leaving for Kua Bay in ten minutes.” I had already laid out what I wanted to take to the beach and had my bathing suit on. We were there by 8 am. Wow! Wow! Wow! There were only six cars there at that hour on a school day. The beach was all but clear. There were several regulars. Damon and Cylin ran into two women they connected with yesterday, Ann and Sherry. Yesterday, they told her they had an orchard. Today Cylin asked them where it was, assuming it was somewhere on the island. No, it was in the state of Washington. They spent six months a year in Hawaii.

   Damon and Cylin went into the water. They were just into bobbing. They both kept their sunglasses on.  

   August refused to go in. Damon kept bugging him. August finally said he had done everything they wanted so far. Now, he wanted to be allowed to do what he wanted. Damon recalled five years ago that, he couldn’t keep August out of the water. Moreover, he demanded his dad go in with him. This is what being almost nineteen means.

     When Cyclin came out, Damon said, “Okay, Betty. Now it’s your turn.”  I needed to hold on to someone for dear life. I have little control over my body in the water. A strong wave can toss me about like a floating ball. Floating is my problem. My lower half floats to the top, and I don’t have the strength to get it back under me. If, for some reason, my legs wind up at waist level, I need help righting. I didn’t just have Damon to help me; Ann, one of the ladies Cylin and Damon had connected with yesterday, was with us too. She volunteered as I walked out into the water and stuck with me until I was ready to get wet. At one point, Damon panicked. He dove under the water to grab my hips to right me. He had his sunglasses on. He hadn’t planned on dunking his head. They stayed on his nose, and all was well.

  When we got out, Damon declared I had been in the water for forty-five minutes. I had a fantastic time. I wished I could go to the beach in the morning regularly. That was out of range for me for now. I couldn’t carry a chair down by myself. Getting down is a challenge for me. I wouldn’t consider going in on my own. Damon and Cylin plan to do the early morning run every day of their future visits.

      Once we got back to shore, we made plans to head home. The first stop was Kona Mountain Coffee, where Damon and Cylin picked up some designer brews and a pound of Kona coffee for a friend. Then we headed home. I ate the soup I made in the car on the way to the beach. Now, Damon made a bagel with cream cheese and lox for me. Then Damon, Cylin, and I played Rummikub.

    Damon and Cylin stripped their bed and put all the linens they used in the laundry room. After they were all packed, they left for the airport. As they left, they all thanked me for hosting them. I would love it if they came more often and stayed longer. It was fantastic having them. As Damon left, he said something wonderful; it would stay with me for a long time. He said, “Thank you for being you.”  Wow! Wow! Wow! That was better than Kua Bay early in the morning with the beach to ourselves.

   I needed to nap after they left. I was exhausted from the forty-five-minute swim alone. Added to that was a grueling one-on-one with Damon over the will. He argued for a distribution based on who cared for me, not family obligations. I felt bruised, but the truth be told, I asked for it. I needed to abandon my original position. Some care for me, and some want nothing to do with me. They never make an effort to reach out to me, not even when I send them money on a birthday. They never reach out to me on mine. They didn’t even reach out when Mike died. It’s pretty darn extreme.

   I had a session with Adolescent D this afternoon, the first since last Tuesday. I asked him the usual questions. Did he listen to the audiofile? Not last night, but yes, the night before. He remembered on his own. Did he read in school today? Yes. Did he understand what he read? Yes. He was so enthusiastic I asked if there had been a significant shift. Yes. He was suddenly reading better. 

  Then I reviewed his feelings about the work we did Tuesday a week ago. At the start of our session, he expressed weariness with doing the work. He said,” Do I have to?”  In response, I switched to a modeling approach. I did all the work. He rated his response as 10. The question I had was how much of that 10 was because he didn’t have to do the work and how much because he could stay focused and enjoy the work. He said 10 for both. Wow! If he feels good about the work, this is how I should be working with him. I modified the work somewhat from last week. This week I transcribed it as well as sounded each phoneme. I left a short delay before saying the phoneme and before writing the letter, giving his mind a chance to fill in the information. I told him he never had to tell me what he was thinking. He said he found the work interesting. Although he also occasionally drifted. I asked him to tell me when he did, so we both became aware of when it happened. My goal is for him to develop greater self-awareness. I believe awareness will help him gain more control over himself.

   I walked Elsa around six. We ran into Lutz. He told me to change his flight to Oahu to pick me up on June 3 after my operation to an 8 am flight. He will have five hours to make his way to the German consulate in the Diamond Head district and back to the airport and the hospital to pick me up after my surgery.

   I watched Reign on Netflix for several days. I’ve had it. It is so anachronistic. Men are so considerate of women’s feelings. The king asks permission before ‘taking’ a young woman in heat. I don’t think so.